My Deepest, Darkest Places

God gave us stuff to kill?

2012-02-13T17:17:00.001-07:00

So I was getting the mail this afternoon, at my dad's house, and saw one of his hunting magazines, Eastman's Hunting Journal. Whenever I see these magazines, I do something that can be described as something between an eye roll and a cringe. I was just never wired to be able to glorify killing things for fun or "for sport."
Not long ago, I found my childhood journal. I hadn't written in it much, but I decided to go through it, just to reminisce. (I think I found it when my mom died, and I wanted to see if there was anything about her I could use for my funeral talk.) I found an envelope in there that contained 3 letters I got way back when I was just thirteen years old. One letter was from my mom, one from my dad, and one from myself. They were written for me to take along and open while I was on a spiritual wilderness outing with other youth from my church. The plan was to fast for the first day and then go out in the trees, by ourselves, and pray and try to commune with God. And at that time, we were to open the letters and read them. To keep this short, I'll just say that my letter to myself was to remind myself of some things I wanted to ask God. It surprised me, pleasantly I guess, that at 13, I had the consciousness to ask God if hunting was wrong. I suppose I was nervous, knowing I'd be old enough to hunt deer and elk with my dad the following year at age 14. (So YOUNG to be out there carrying and shooting a high-powered rifle, especially with so many other hunters in the same mountains.)
Well, I guess it took me about 4 more years to fully understand God's answer to my question. I hunted and killed a tiny little 2-point mule deer my first year, age 14. I remember feeling the adrenaline while aiming and pulling the trigger; then again while walking up on my kill. I was feeling happy, knowing I had made my dad proud of my shooting ability (Open sights, no scope, from 150 yds). At the same time, there was this unavoidable feeling of doubt, staring at this animal whose life I'd taken. But what was done was done. I hunted after that, but didn't kill again until I was 17. My dad had gotten me a permit to shoot a pronghorn in Southern Utah. We drove down really early in the morning. I was driving my own car so I could head home in time to work later that day. On the way down, still dark out, I hit a deer with my car. I radioed my dad to tell him the bad news. He came back to put the deer out of its misery. (I guess I couldn't?) We mashed the folded hood down so I could see and kept on south. We hadn't been down there long, (Parker Mountain, I believe) when we saw some pronghorn. I got out with my rifle, sneaked along the ground and got a shot off. I can't remember for sure but, I think I hid it in the guts on the first shot, so I shot again to kill it. When I walked up on it, I wasn't really excited, other than my curiosity of what a pronghorn looks like up close being satisfied. I began to gut it out, which I really didn't know how to do, but my dad wanted me to learn that way. I accidentally cut into its bladder (a bad mistake) and the stench was awful. Pronghorn aren't that tasty; most people don't even eat the meat; at least not much of it. Finally, standing there, looking down at this beautiful animal, something changed inside of me for good. I didn't understand it all right then but, a while later, realized I was not a sport hunter. And as far as I understand my god, I can only believe that hunting, for ANY reason other than to feed yourself and others, is wrong. I haven't completely sworn hunting off; I've considered harvesting an elk because I really like the meat and it's better for us than feed-lot cattle. But I will NEVER hunt an animal because I want to see its head on my wall, its rug on my floor, or my picture with it in a magazine.
Now, back to the magazine I found in the mail today. I didn't open it; I know what it says inside; I've heard it all and read it all before, being an advocate for wolves. A big headline on the cover read: "Hunting God's Country for Wolves." To me, this is one of the most ironic phrases I can think of. This headline assumes that the writer and the reader believe in God. And for sure, they're speaking of the Judeo-Christian God, Eloheim, Heavenly Father, Jesus the Christ, etc...And I can't wrap my mind around the concept of believing in God, believing you're toting a gun around God's country, and somehow, God is eh-OK with you killing wolves (God's creation) for sport and fun.
I know that I don't know everything, or even very much. But I know irony when I read it.

What do you know about being Mormon?

2012-01-12T12:21:00.001-07:00

Hey Everyone:I decided to make a non-scientific survey about the Mormon faith. I'm curious about what Mormons and non-Mormons think or believe about the following questions. Please feel free to answer in a comment or to email me with your answers if you'd rather your answers be private.(You'll notice I'm not looking for yes or no answers, because I actually want a personally thought out, personal answer.)

1. Are you a member of the Mormon Church?

2. If you are a member, do you consider yourself to be "active?"

3. If you are NOT a Mormon, do you at least know someone who is a member of the Mormon Church?

4. What is your understanding about what Mormons believe about who God is? (Trinity believe or not? God is a man/woman/spiritual being/other?)

5. What is your understanding about what Mormons believe about Joseph Smith's role?

6. Do you follow the Mormon "Word of Wisdom" commandment? What exactly does it mean to follow it or not to follow it?

7. What do Mormons believe about Jesus? What was/is his role?

8. Do Mormons believe in modern-day prophecy? What does this mean?

9. Have you ever disagreed with a Mormon prophet? If so, on what matter? And if so, do you believe this affects your salvation or your future in an after-life?

10. Arrange the following 'sins' in order; least to worst:     a. murder
     b. smoking
     c. stealing
     d. adultery
     e. lying
     f. drinking
     OR, do you believe sin is sin?

11. Where do Mormons draw the line? What will keep one out of Heaven?

12. What is required, in the Mormon church, to get into Heaven?

13. Did you, or do you plan to serve as a Mormon missionary?

14. What is the role of Mormon temples?

15. What does it mean to you to be a "good Mormon?" Using some of the above topics for question, talk about them in the context of being a "good Mormon?"

16. Do Mormons believe in marriage at a specific age?

17. How big or small are Mormon families?

18. Are Mormons Republican or Democrat? Should they be one more than or, instead of, the other?

19. Does your faith influence your politics? Is it possible to keep the two separate?

20. What is the role of the Bible? The Book of Mormon? The Doctrine and Covenants or Pearl of Great Price?

21. What is the best Mormon-based book you've read, NOT including canonized scripture?

22. If you're Mormon, is your family Mormon? Your extended family?

23. When did you become Mormon?

24. What would you say are the top two or three benefits or blessings you enjoy through being Mormon?

25. From the following choices, would any of the following keep you from being friends:
     a. a person who smokes?
     b. a person who drinks?
     c. a person who has premarital sexual relations?
     d. a person who swears or uses profanity?
     e. a person who watches R-rated movies?
     f. a person who is politically opposite you?
     g. a person who is gay/lesbian/transgender?

26. Would any of the choices from question 25 keep a Mormon from being a 'good Mormon?'

27. If you are Mormon, what do you think of someone who votes pro-choice? Of a person who votes pro-life?

28. Are you more or less inclined, or neither, to trust a Mormon?

29. In no more than a couple of sentences, describe people of the Mormon faith as you best understand?

30. If you are not a Mormon, would you ever consider becoming one? Why or why not?

Additional questions revision:

31. Are Mormons racist or prejudice? If you say yes, do you believe this is born out of what is taught in church, or do you believe it's just personal choice?

32. Do you find any of the doctrines of Mormonism to be strange/weird/occult/not Christ-like? Please explain your answer.

33. What is the difference between faith and knowledge, and how do you apply that to your own religion, or to your relationship with God?

34. In your own words, from your own experience, who/what is God?

35. If you were to give any advice to a Mormon about their religion, what would it be? (Keep it to one or two sentences. And go ahead and answer whether or not you are Mormon.)

Thanks Everyone for taking this survey. If you'd like, you can just cut and paste the questions with your answers and private message it to me. You can also send it to my email, if you'd rather at iamtherascal1@gmail.com.

I LOVE this!

2011-08-31T11:34:00.001-06:00

http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/52486958-78/mayne-gay-lds-ward.html.csp?page=2#disqus_thread

The Lightning

2011-08-29T10:20:00.005-06:00

This was taken last night near Spanish Fork on Arrowhead Trail. My friend Tim shot this one, and the next, aimed straight up above us, which is why you see water droplets on the lens, blurring out some of the bolts.

From Arrowhead Trail, looking at the lightning striking over Payson.
All of the following were taken Saturday night. It was an amazing storm.
I was parked out West of Payson, out Utah Ave., and just past the train tracks, aiming the camera toward Genola. Some people have mentioned that they dislike the pole in my shots. I kept it in some of the photos to give some composition and to show that this extreme weather is happening right in our backyard.

Lucky number seven?

I'm sort of fascinated by lightning photography because it is a little challenging, but also because it gives you the chance to really view a lightning strike, whereas, in real time, you have about a millisecond to see it as it happens.

If you see any of these you really like, feel free to let me know. Or, if you really don't like one for one reason or another, I welcome constructive criticism, as an aspiring photographer.

Late Night Lightning Storm

2011-08-15T03:30:00.002-06:00

I have this fascination with lightning storms and, a goal of mine is to capture some lightning, but in that oh-so-perfect shot. I have yet to nail it like i want to but, here are three pics I got at between 1:30 and 3:00AM. The first one isn't too great, but it shows you all of the many tens of branches of a lightning bolt. The light at the bottom left is just a street lamp. All of these were taken from the spit at Lincoln Beach, Utah Lake State Park, UT.
This one is a little better. It took me a while to get the camera all dialed in so it was performing about how I needed it to. At first, I had the f number too big and, apparently, the ISO too low. Maybe my camera just isn't good enough because, I've read people online shooting lightning at 100 ISO. But my sensor wasn't picking up much at 200. So, I had to bump that up to 800 for these. I have a lot to learn. There aren't many lightning-shooting experts, and I don't have any photographer friends who've shot much of it so, I'm probably on my own to get it figured out. Here's hoping for another great storm soon.
I couldn't seem to get away from the wind and the rain, in order to stay set up outside, on the ground. So, I was doing the best I could inside my car. My tripod definitely isn't the best and, it doesn't fit real well on the passenger seat where I had it. But, that was the way things went tonight. As you can see, the way I had it set up on the passenger seat, it was more than slightly off-kilter; the bottom of the frame in the 3rd pic is some distant land on the left and the surface of Utah Lake on the right. This shot could have been so much better, had I been able to set up on the ground with everything perfectly set for a nice landscape shot. Oh well; I think it's my best lightning shot to date. I won't quit trying to get that perfect shot, somewhere down the road.

Said I'd NEVER do one of these again...

2011-08-13T17:03:00.004-06:00

The very handsome couple.

Decided to shoot my friend's small wedding ceremony yesterday, even though I had sworn never to do one again after my first go at it. But it was for a good friend and I made clear there was to be no pressure on me; I'm NOT the wedding photographer; just a guest who happened to have his camera. It was beautifully set on a bluff and overlooking a very pretty little valley. Some of you will certainly recognize the area. It was actually inside a cemetery, which seems bizarre on its face. But it's actually just a pioneer memorial and, while there are many small headstones, I don't think there are people actually buried there. Could be wrong. Anyway, it was a beautiful day, albeit hotter than blazes, and the small ceremony was perfect.

Congratulations, You Two!

"Lord, beer me patience."

2011-08-07T23:32:00.002-06:00

Speaking of beer, I haven't been down to the cemetery to drink O'Douls with my mom since the first time. I have been to her grave site a couple of more times, but just briefly. I had Jericho with me last time, which makes it tougher to really concentrate down there. But really, he makes it easier to be down there. I can kind of talk myself through things, by talking to him; telling him that this is now one of Grandma's houses and that she lives with Jesus. Am I convinced though?

I'm still having a difficult time really facing this. Maybe I'm afraid it's just too hard, or that it's going to hurt just too bad. So instead, I avoid it. I think about my mom, but very superficially, meaning, I picture her alive for a second at a time, and then I shut it all out, never wanting to come face to face with what is real. I frustrate myself, but I accept the fact that I may be just too weak right now.

I went to my first therapy session last Thursday, which was good. So many people want to be there for me right now, and I'm so lucky to have so many good, loving and caring people in my life. The thing is, I just never have much to say. The conversations usually go like this:
Friend: "So, how are you holding up?"
Me: "Um...I'm doing OK, how are you?"
Friend: "Good. So how's your family hanging in there?"
Me: "Um...Pretty good, I guess."
Friend: "I just want you to know I'm thinking of you and am here if you need anything. Do you need anything?"
Me: "Um...thanks. I can't think of anything at the moment."

Have you ever heard anyone say to you, "Life has lost its taste, its smell, its feel?" Well, a lot of days, that's how it is. It's just very....gray. And not the good, rich color of gray that's on our walls. But a cold, empty, meaningless gray. It kind of gets me down and keeps me down, usually for 12-24 hours. When it happens, I think I can be a bit of a jerk. I am sorry if any of you have caught me on these days, and I know some of you have. Please be patient with me. Know that I so appreciate you and your friendship and your trying to help. I just sometimes have nothing to say, literally. Like I actually cannot put into words anything, because I really don't feel anything.

It was good talking to my therapist; it helped me to be able to actually tell someone that I feel nothing; that I feel just numb and like I'm avoiding the new reality of my life. It was nice to be able to let out a few of my frustrations, as well. It's hard not to feel bitter sometimes; angry at God for allowing my mom to suffer for so many years; angry at friends or family who I thought should have been here to help after Mom died; angry at doctors who were never well enough connected to their patient to ever have a shot at making things better. It's just good to...feel.

I have a hard road ahead; this became clear as the therapist (we'll call him Bob) tried to lay out some things I should expect. He said that I am numb; that I've sort of wrapped myself up in a cocoon to protect myself. He said it's normal, but that I will probably become a complete mess in another month or so. (Yeah, he actually used the word 'mess.') He suggested I cut my school load back, because he's sure I'm not going to do as well as I need to in my classes. (Not sure what to do here; I need to get my classes done.) He said that I will never feel the same again; I'll never be quite the same again. And as for my relationships, he told me to expect one group of people to come closer and overwhelm me with their love and friendship. And the other group will pull away, being now uncomfortable with the new me and with the idea of death altogether. So, I guess I can't get too mad at people; it's natural; it's bound to happen, he says.

One thing he told me, which I really liked, is that, when I do begin to fall apart, and when I sort of strip off that protective cocoon, to just let the emotions that come wash over me; that I should let them just envelope me like a wave and just...feel everything. Now, the falling apart thing doesn't sound like fun, especially that I'll be a mess for around 2 years before I begin to sort of get passed the pain. However, I'm so frustrated with the way I'm acting now; the way I'm just sort of avoiding reality and building these stupid cocoons, the prospect of really dealing with the loss of my sweet mom, and really feeling that, and beginning to maybe try talking to her, and really start living my life with some meaning again, is exciting. Ugh. Everything I'm saying sounds so weird.

I need to be patient. This is my new reality; this is the path down which I must go. I hope I can get through these next two years with some kind of grace, coming out a better, wiser, more compassionate human being; and a better husband, father, brother and son, to BOTH of my parents.

Anyway, I'm aware that so many of you are thinking of, and praying for me and my family. I am so blessed. If I seem stand offish, or curt, or just out of words for you, on a given day, I apologize. I've just nothing to say right then. But know that I think of all of you often, and know that I am lucky.

You might think I'm crazy

2011-08-03T14:36:00.004-06:00

A picture of my mom (left) and her sister. My aunt died about 2 years ago. Mom never got over that. I'm happy at the thought that they are likely hanging out again, smiling down on their loved ones.

Well, there's a lot on my mind lately. Some of which, I talk about, some of which I don't. With my mom's death, I am really trying to handle everything in a good way, though I already know I'm not in some ways. I should be talking about everything with the people I love; instead, I mostly would rather keep it inside, and pretend that everything is fine. At the same time, I want to deal with it openly; I just wonder if that will come as time goes on.

When I wrote my talk for Mom's funeral, I had so much on my mind; so much I wanted to say. I struggled though with what would be appropriate; I wondered what words would honor my mom the best. I tried not to make it about me; it was her day. And I hope, as we talked about our love for her, that she was there, somewhere, listening with a peaceful smile on her face. There was a lot that, ultimately, I decided not to include in my talk. And while I think I made the right choice to omit that which I did, I still think about those things, so I want to write them down, so I can have them for later. And maybe I want to share some of it; hoping someone's ears might relate.

Though we're not sure, we think it's possible that Mom said goodbye to the world on the night of the 11th, rather than the morning of the 12th. This doesn't really matter, does it? But what I'm about to share gives some perspective on why it matters to me. When I came home on the night of the 11th, as I walked toward the apartment, I heard a raven calling. I looked up, and there on the light post near my van, was a raven. It was calling, though I obviously don't know what it was trying to communicate. The reason this is odd is that I hadn't remembered seeing ravens around downtown, and I LOVE ravens, for various reasons, so it definitely caught my attention this night. After thinking, "Hmm...that's different," I continued on my way upstairs, forgetting about the black raven on the light.

The next morning, the 12th, as I headed out the door to my van for work, that same raven was still there, still calling. And I thought it bizarre, but also enjoyed seeing him. Well, after a couple of hours at work, I got the news of my mom's passing and left the job site to come home. The rest of it, most of you already know.

I know you're asking yourself, "Is he going to somehow tie all of this together so it makes any sense?" Yes, I am. If you know me, you know I love wild things, the animals, the mountains. You know I especially love Alaska and wolves. Well, in my studies of wolves for over a decade now, I've become fond of ravens. You see, ravens and wolves are part of what is termed a "symbiotic relationship," meaning they count on each other for survival, to put it simply. Ravens are scavengers and they follow the wolves, knowing they'll eventually get to pick the leftovers off of old elk, moose or bison carcasses. Biologists now believe the wolves are following the ravens as well. Ravens have been observed calling to the wolves and telling them where to find prey. So they work together. To some people, this is no big deal. To me, it's all the more fascinating.

Anyway, while living in Alaska, I learned about Northwestern Native folklore and symbolism. I loved the tribal paintings of ravens and I would often pick up books and browse the native lore about ravens. So here is where I'll tie it together. In much of that native legend and lore, Raven has several roles. One of the most important is that he is a creator. But one of the darker legends is that he is a messenger of death. Was it coincidence that the raven was in our parking lot? I don't know; maybe. But maybe not. That he was there, calling while I was walking by, and the only one around, on the night of the 11th and the morning of the 12th is strange at the very least. Personally, the symbolism isn't lost on me.

I decided not to include that in my talk. I figured the meaning would be lost on about everyone. I think Mom might have gotten it, if I had explained it to her. She wasn't superstitious; she was "a little sticious." But it really probably was best to keep the raven bit out of the funeral and just throw it somewhere into the great abyss of my blog. So there you go. Think I'm crazy? That's OK. I probably am.

I need a tool store for this...

2011-07-27T17:35:00.006-06:00

I'm trying to figure out what it is I'm thinking. My dear mother passed away just over 2 weeks ago. What's more; she is gone because she chose to go. So, now we're left to deal with that. It has been anything but easy. I consider myself to be emotionally strong; able to handle all kinds of difficult situations. However, I'm coming to grips with the fact that I just don't have the tools to deal with this one. I guess I need to find a good tool store.

Today was an OK day, meaning, I didn't cry. I'm not very happy, but I managed one or two half-smiles, I think. And I worked a full day, though I doubt it was as productive as it could have been. Yesterday, however, was one of my worst days yet, following the my mother's passing. How does it feel? It seems impossible to describe; I've not before gone through some of the emotions I'm now experiencing. I feel completely lost. I'm feeling things, but I don't know what to do with those feelings, which also makes me just numb. I'm in a fog, knowing not which way is up, or which way is down. There is a constant sadness that my mom is dead. (And can I just say I HATE hearing myself say the words "my mom is dead?") I definitely feel that a big piece of me is totally gone. There is now an emptiness in my heart. Not empty, entirely; I still have many things I love, thank God. But the emptiness or hollowness is palpable, most of the time.

...Days later...

Well, I'm just sort of going through the motions, still. I definitely need help getting through this; not so much for the immediate present, but for the hard times that will inevitably come in the future. I went up to my school on Friday, to see about getting some grief counseling. (Or any counseling; whatever they recommend for a son who lost their mother to suicide.) They had to schedule my first appointment for a week later so, I'll see the therapist this coming Thursday. I'm looking forward to it; I just feel like I need some direction in dealing with this and I am incapable of figuring it out myself.
You know, I had become accustomed to being at my parents' home, but not actually seeing or visiting with my mother. Often, in the past few years, she'd stay in her room, lying in bed, or being fast asleep during the middle of the day. This is causing me, what I view is more trouble now. I don't think I'm dealing with what is reality. I mean, I saw my mom's body that day. I saw the medical examiner take her away. I saw her lying in a casket, in which she was to be buried. I spoke at her funeral and I carried her casket to her final resting place. Yet, I haven't accepted that she's actually dead. The fact that she isn't just lying in her room, asleep, has not yet become my reality. To me, when I'm out visiting with Dad, or just driving by, Mom is probably just in her room, having a bad day, or a sick day, or just tired and asleep. But that's not the case, is it? Oh, I cried some good tears on that day, and the following days. My emotions were raw, as they should be. But now, that it actually counts, and now that it's really real, it's not real at all. And if that is how I feel, how can I ever really mourn the loss of my mom? How can I heal my broken heart? How can I deal with the fact that she left us because she wanted to leave this cruel world, which included me? This is definitely going to require the help of a/some professional(s).

I worry about the rest of the family, that they may not get the help they need for this traumatic experience and loss. I worry about my dad, who found Mom that day. He's on the road plenty with work. In a way, keeping busy is helpful. On the other hand, the more he has his mind preoccupied, the more he may begin to think, "Ah, I've got this; I don't need any help; I'll be OK." I am very much pro-therapy. I really tried to stress to my dad and siblings NOT to play tough guy with this; this will not simply disappear. It needs to be dealt with in a healthy way, and with help from the experts.

Oh, what a long road lies ahead.

A DAY LATER...

Not a horrible day. One thing which keeps become more and more clear; If you think you know who your friends are, and that you know who cares about you, wait until something tragic happens when you need them; you'll definitely realize who your friends are, and who your friends aren't, and never were. OK, maybe that's the last time I'll mention this. Maybe.

Today, we hung out at my dad's house, while he visited with a woman who is hooking him up with a grave marker. My little sister and brother were there, too. I definitely like hanging out with them. It's comforting to have us all there, together. My dad and sister had placed a solar powered, lighted flower at Mom's grave earlier. Tonight, Jericho and I stopped down there to see it. I struggle to get in touch with my true feelings. I keep feeling like I need to talk to my mom, but can't bring myself to do it. Maybe I'm afraid of what I'll say; maybe I'm afraid to feel her presence; that it won't be her, physically. That will make it all pretty real, won't it? I probably wouldn't have stopped if Jericho hadn't been with me. It's comforting to have him there with me. Instead of trying to talk with Mom, or to feel her presence, I avoided it altogether by talking with Jericho and telling him how that flower is Grandma; that this is one of her houses now; that she lives with Jesus.

I miss my mom. I'm in pain about it tonight. I guess that's a good thing.

I belong to a club that no one should ever try to belong to. I guess though, it's a positive thing to know I'm not alone; other people have survived this so I should be able to as well.

Men greive differently...

2011-07-26T17:55:00.001-06:00

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/26/health/26grief.html?_r=1&hpw

Utah Wild Horses Shoot

2011-06-30T09:40:00.003-06:00

I loved this shoot sooo much. Can't wait to do it again! Big thanks to my good friend, Preston, for taking me out there and showing me how it's done. (And for use of his amazing lens again.)
I really loved this white horse. It was the first one I saw, and it's just very wild and primitive looking, with it's long, stringy white mane.
I didn't notice anything amiss while we were shooting. It wasn't until I downloaded the photos to my hard drive that I noticed something surprising about this palomino. Can you see it?
This gray stallion was the boss. He was stirring the others up and sort of herding them around. A very tough looking horse.
Wild horses being....wild. I was so glad to see the landscape out there so colorful. I've been out there a half dozen times and it's always very brown and dead looking. With the long Winter and very mild Spring, there's lots of greens on the ground, making these pics all the more sweet.
This guy was sort of a buckskin, I guess. A very powerful looking horse. He was impressive in every way, from his long, stringy mane and tail, to his wildly colored coat, to his very muscular appearance.
We were hoping for a lot more action from these horses than we got; perhaps the heat made them a bit more docile than usual. It was 91 degrees at 5 o'clock. Every once in awhile, though, a couple of them would pick at each other until one of them would explode a bit; nothing long-lasting; just a very wild-sounding winnie, and a kick or two.
There is something very freeing, being out in the desert, and seeing horses, living in very wild, often harsh conditions. I was raised with horses and my family has always had 4 or 5 around. But being out there last night, I have a sense that this is the life meant for the toughest, hardiest of beasts. And for them, they'd prefer it no other way than to be free of reins, free of saddle and rider, free of any fence or gate. I can't wait to get back out there. I will dream about it until then.

A Tale of Two Mormons

2011-06-21T15:43:00.006-06:00

This is a brief overview of the 2012 presidential candidates, Mitt Romney and Jon Huntsman, Jr. I'm curious to know--and I still don't--why Utah Mormons favor Mitt Romney over Huntsman so overwhelmingly. Sort of gives me secondary embarrassment. (By the way, I make no secret that I'm supporting Huntsman in 2012.)

Jon Huntsman, Jr.

Environment: "One of the Governor's first priorities after taking office was to meet with Energy Secretary Samuel W. Bodman to discuss the removal of the radioactive mill tailings. The tailings pose a leaching threat to the Colorado River, and possible contamination to water users downstream."

(http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:pljTB569wVMJ:www.utah.gov/governor/news_media/article.html%3Farticle%3D687+huntsman%27s+record+on+wild+lands&cd=10&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&source=www.google.com)

Climate change: Huntsman backed a program by Western states to limit greenhouse gases considered responsible for climate change through a cap-and-trade plan. While he is a progressive on environmental issues, he opposes the Cap and Trade Bill, based on the premise that the economy can't take it. (USA Today)

Civil unions: Huntsman backs civil unions for gay couples, calling it a fairness issue...Huntsman told ABC News' George Stephanopoulos that he believed in "traditional marriage" but that supporting civil unions was a "fairness issue." (USA Today)

Wilderness Issues: On wilderness issues, such as the roadless rule, he seems to walk right down the middle, where he wants wilderness preserved, but wants all potential stakeholders involved in the process. (On this, I'm likely to disagree, since often the only stakeholders that matter are the ones who have the most money.) But I give him credit for taking a moderate approach, rather than a pro-energy approach above all. (Just today, the UT legislature met with the BLM to talk about future approaches to land management and wilderness designation; unfortunately, I think it's headed for WAY less federal input and more immediate local input. On many issues, I think the decisions should be left up to the most local government. But, The Grand Staircase, for instance, is not just Southern Utah's land; it belongs to everyone.) Mostly, my bias be exposed, I'm worried for the few beautiful places left; that they're all too often eyed by the all-mighty dollar and the all-mighty oil/gas industry. Come on, Huntsman! Be a champion on this issue!

Crossing political lines: Well, most obviously, Huntsman, Jr. accepted the position as Ambassador to China, under Pres. Obama...that's enough proof for me that he puts service above party. Also, of late, he's made several public slams about the Republicans in Washington. Prove me wrong if I am but, I haven't heard Romney do the same, ever.

Abortion: Huntsman, Jr. is pro-life and signed into a law a parental consent requirement for pregnant teens to obtain an abortion. He also answered in an ABC interview that he would support a Right to Life Amendment, meaning, making abortion illegal, except in the cases of rape or incest, or to protect the life of the mother. He and his wife have both biological and adopted children. I'm respectful of a pro-life stance, as long as it doesn't entirely take away a woman's ultimate right to choose.

Immigration: He focused a lot on immigration, due to pressure from Utahns. He pressured the Western Governors' Association to work on immigration reforms. As far as I can tell, he was for a pathway to citizenship for all who wanted it, meaning a green card as a right to work, a work visa as a pathway toward citizenship. As with nearly everything, he approaches the issues with sensibility; he's very cerebral about things, always wanting to ignore emotion and rhetoric...and party.

Gun ownership: Recently said in an ABC interview that he would NOT veto an assault weapons ban. (Actually, this was a gaffe; he called the interviewer back soon and said he'd misunderstood the way the question was phrased and said he WOULD veto an assault weapons ban and pointed to his record on 2nd Amendment rights in Utah). Utah has THE most lax rules and laws as it pertains to gun ownership and gun rights.

Personal: Married, father of at least 6 kids (2006 bio), Member of the LDS Church though maybe not what Utah Mormons would consider "orthodox." Grandfather was a Mormon apostle, father is a Seventy. Dropped out of high school, later to obtain his GED. Served Mormon Mission in Taiwan. Graduated from U of Penn in Business.

Mitt Romney

Environment: The former Massachusetts governor has stood on each side of the cap-and-trade issue; he has gone from staunch advocate for taking on global warming to a climate change skeptic. He does think humans do contribute to climate change, to some unknown extent, but he seems always to fall to the side of let's not legislate anything based on it, especially if it might slow the economy. (I'm no fan of total deregulation; I believe Romney will undo any and all regulation of oil/gas drilling, as well as the banks.) He once claimed he was a lifelong hunter, then said anyone who called him a hunter had “mischaracterized” him. He supports clean energy, just not in the form of wind turbines off the coast of Cape Cod. (Eco-Nomics)

Gay Marriage/Civil Unions: First and foremost, he's still willing, if pushed by his party, to repeal the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell, which kills him on this issue, in my opinion. Welcome to 2011 America, Mitt. (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9086489/ns/msnbc_tv-hardball_with_chris_matthews/t/romney-plays-hardball-gay-marriage/from/toolbar)

Mitt Romney's gay rights flip-flop: When running for senate in 1994, Mitt Romney wrote a letter promising a gay Republican group he would be a stronger advocate for gay rights than Kennedy. Romney was trying to get an endorsement from the Log Cabin Republicans. The letter said, "...as we seek to establish full equality for America's gay and lesbian citizens, I will provide more effective leadership than my opponent." Romney has recently made it clear that he opposes gay marriage and he is trying to position himself as the most conservative candidate for U.S. president, opposing most rights for gays and lesbians.

Abortion Rights:

In October 2002, campaigning for governorship of Massachusetts, Mitt Romney said he would “preserve and protect” a woman’s right to choose. He now describes himself as opposing abortion. His political positions as governor were pro-choice, although he vetoed different legislation that would have "expanded abortion rights." He's since said if a bill came across his desk as president, to ban all abortions, he'd gladly sign it.
Again, I have respect for the pro-life position, except when it attempts to infringe upon the woman's ultimate freedom to choose. (And tough to tell, really, where Romney stands; seems always to depend on who his audience is.)

Immigration: He had been somewhat compassionate on immigration, not wanting to keep illegal children from receiving aid, such as in-state tuition. He then, in 2007, took a hard-line approach and said no aid, no amnesty, no work for illegals. They'll all have to go home at some point. As well, he authorized MA's police force to arrest illegal immigrants. (ontheissues.org). Again, sort of depends on his audience.

Guns: Said during his governor campaign that he "...is NOT inline with the NRA." In 2006, while still governor, he joined the NRA.

Taxes: Raised over $500M in taxes and fees; fees on marriage licenses and impact fees for building homes, and raised taxes on businesses.

Health care: Created universal healthcare, including a health insurance mandate in MA, after which Obamacare has greatly been modeled. Now, he's really, REALLY against Obamacare.

Personal: 5 kids, married, graduate of BYU and Harvard Biz and Law Schools. Mormon missionary in France. Helped make the '02 SLC Olympics financially successful.

During the most recent Republican debate 2011, Romney's big campaign platform seemed to be " Obama sucks." Nothing really offered from the man himself.

So, what is it, Utah Mormons? What is up with the love affair of Mitt Romney, especially to the point of overwhelming preference over Gov. Huntsman? I don't get it.

2 million acres of AMAZING

2011-06-14T10:36:00.003-06:00

OK; yes, I'm aware that this train has NOTHING to do with Yellowstone, but we did see it on our trip home. As we made our way toward Echo, UT from Evanston, WY, we passed this train. Brynn had to shoot the pic from our moving car so we couldn't capture the whole thing. But this train was a mile long and each and every flat bed (the whole train) had these tanks on them. It was so crazy to see a mile of these tanks just going down the train tracks. I have no idea where they were going but, ARE WE PLANNING ANOTHER WAR?!?!
OK, this was also on the way home, through Randolph, UT. A few trees at the tiny post office were full of maybe 20 vultures. I've taken pictures of these birds before, in other places, but I couldn't resist. Pretty cool creatures, if you ask me. Nature's garbage disposals for any and every carcass.
This is Lewis Lake, and is actually in Grand Teton National Park, south of Yellowstone; the two are connected. I was actually surprised that the entire lake was still covered with ice in mid-June. But it made me happy; I'm not nearly ready for the Summer heat. This lake is at 8000 feet above sea level, so I guess it's not all that unusual for it to be frozen.
These were the last animals I shot in YNP. They're sandhill cranes. I have seen them and shot them before, here in Utah, but I had never seen a sandhill chick. Come to think of it, I haven't seen the babies of very many birds at all, especially the wild ones. This is an excellent time of year to visit YNP if you're into babies. Most of the animals have them now.
Just a landscape. I am sort of sad that I didn't take more time to shoot landscapes, as there are many, many incredible opportunities for them in Yellowstone. I need a second camera so I can keep one set up for super telephotos of wildlife, and the other for landscapes. This shot is OK, but I passed up some amazing shots out of pure laziness and sort of a one-track mind for wildlife. But I think you still get the idea that YNP is a very special, very beautiful place. 2 million acres of intact ecosystem. I wish places like this were more valuable to people. Instead, the special places are usually considered "waste land" and prime locations for drilling rigs or coal mines and the like.
This momma badger is out hunting for ground squirrels. I watched her leave her den and disappear down a squirrels den for about 5 minutes. She came up with nothing, unfortunately, but went on hunting. I thought I'd hang out by her den to see if she'd return with food for her babies, but I was pressed for time and had to leave before that happened.
Here's momma with her two babies. Aren't they cute? They were really fun to see and to watch as they played with each other, practice fighting like a lot of other baby animals. We used to see a lot of them around here, but it's been over ten years since I've seen any. The farmers have killed them off; guess they didn't like them threatening their chickens. Even I killed one once, in order to keep it from killing a small puppy chained up in someone's yard. I wish I hadn't have now. But I'm pretty sure that puppy would have been badger food if I hadn't.
This is one of three grizzlies I saw while in YNP this time. The first one was too far out to bother with the camera. The second one, which was in this same area, was still pretty far out; I have pictures that aren't worth posting. This guy was awesome and ended up walking right by me and another photographer. He passed by us at about 20 yards and then went into the river, swam across, and this is him getting out the other side.
This is him again; doesn't he have a cute butt?
Here he gave us a little smile for the camera before going on. I was ecstatic to get pictures like these. I've definitely had less successful trips than this one before. Thanks for showing up, Mr. Bear!
These are river otters. I was lucky enough to shoot some two Winters ago in YNP. At that time, the river they were in was mostly frozen. But they'd go in what little open water there was and come up with fish after every dive, it seemed. There were 3 this time, though I only managed to get two in the shot. When I saw them, I was too close for the lens I had on. I waited just long enough to get this shot, which isn't great. Then, they dove in and went upstream to fish, only poking their heads up a couple of times. Wish I could have done better with them. Oh well, I'm so driven to get back up there. In another life, I'll be a wildlife photographer ;)

I could love it here...

2011-06-12T15:35:00.005-06:00

Well, we made it to Yellowstone yesterday afternoon. Brynn suggested the trip about a week ago, to my surprise. I LOVE Yellowstone and would like to make it a bi or tri-annual trip. But, with our busy schedules, once a year is better than nothing. I fell in love with Montana way back in high school, when me and four friends moved up to the town of Red Lodge, after our junior year of high school. We were only there for that Summer, but it was long enough to bond with the place. There's a feeling of freedom and wildness here, not unlike the feeling I get in Alaska. I think, once I'm done with school, we'll be looking for work in Alaska and Montana and I'll be in Heaven in either place. This first photo is a coyote. She was hunting by herself along a little pond.
These mountains are very "Montana" to me. I love the mountains in this place and in Wyoming, which are tall and often look like huge grassy meadows reaching to the sky. I took this photo along the trail to Hellroaring Creek.
I've seen more bison here than ever before. They're everywhere; doing very well, I'd say. This was along the NE Entrance Road, just a bit east of Lamar Valley.
The bison calves are so cute, and they're everywhere. I'm sure some will fall prey to wolves and bears. For the most part though, elk seem to be the main course for predators. I watched 2 wolves, early this morning, run right through a group of bison calves. That I could see, they left them alone. Unfortunately, the wolves were an easy 1/2 to 3/4 mile or so from me; no chance for a photo, even with an nice 400mm lens. There's still hope, as we're here until tomorrow. I plan on checking out the Slough Creek area for the pack of wolves there. Rumor has it, one member has been seen at fairly close range.
Mid-June looks pretty great in Yellowstone Nat'l Park.

Seahawks and sea monsters...

2011-05-31T22:47:00.005-06:00

OK. These will be in reverse order, I guess; I don't have the patience to move everything around at this point. Most people who watch the NFL don't realize that the mascot for Seattle's football team--the Seahawks--is actually an Osprey; seahawk is just a nickname. This one is just coming back out of the water after diving, unsuccessfully, for a fish.
You can just see his head; he's just getting upright, readying his wings to fly up and out of there.
Osprey are AMAZING fishers. Unlike bald eagles, which swoop down and grab fish off the surface of the water with their talons, osprey actually dive right in, under the water when they have to.
You can just see the tips of his wings here, immediately after the dive. It was so great to watch this predator; he must have dove 5 or 6 different times. Unfortunately for him, he never caught anything. However, a couple of years ago, I was fishing the Weber River around Coalville, where there were many osprey nesting in the area. And while my friend and I caught nothing, we watched fish after fish being pulled out of the river by these great raptors.
Hitting the water hard for that elusive fish.
They soar around, watching the water for movement and once they find it, they sort of square up and plunge quickly for the water.
Just coming back out of the water. Was so hoping he'd have luck on his side. But alas, he came up empty.
As I was trying to follow him through my lens, I snapped just as a magpie flew across my lens. Thought it made an interesting shot.
Thank you, Mr. Osprey, for an AMAZING performance!
Pelican, just landing.
I love these black birds with the bright yellow eyes!
Like many bird species, pelicans seem to stick to a mate for life. What a cute couple.
Not difficult for me to fathom a close relationship between today's birds and yesterday's dinosaurs.
Trying to scoop up some fish.

Kill so they can kill some more...

2011-05-19T22:57:00.005-06:00

Let me preface this entry with this: Hunting for your subsistence is honorable; killing for sport is another thing altogether. I will repeatedly use the term "hunter" in this entry; I am directing the majority of my claims toward the sport/trophy hunters, as I believe they are the biggest enemy of the wolf.

All of you know by now my affinity for nature, for wildlife, and especially for wolves. For the past 6 months, there has been more and more talk about the wolf issue here in the West. As you can imagine by reading my other wolf-related entries, this issue gets people heated. Why do people--specifically hunters--hate wolves so much? Why do groups like Safari International, Big Game Forever, Cabela's and others lobby so hard to get rid of the wolves? There is a pretty simple answer.

If you mention wolves around the vast majority of hunting enthusiasts, your likely to get an earful. They love regurgitating the talking points they've gotten from "sportsmen" shows, magazines, stores, and other hunters. Pick up nearly any hunting magazine around here and you'll find an article or four about how wolf reintroduction has "decimated" the ungulate populations. Now, even though the word decimate literally means to take one out of every ten, the hunter will go on and on about how there are NO elk left; they'll ramble about how they've hunted an area for 20 years and now there are NO elk or deer anywhere. The truth about this claim of decimation is true and it isn't. Certainly, areas where many hundreds or thousands of elk once roamed out of check, are now found to be with fewer elk, but this doesn't mean there are NO elk; it usually means the elk have scattered; moved on to other areas with fewer predators. What hunters won't mention is the fact that, in places like MT, WY and ID, after 15 years of wolves, elk numbers are still exceeding state objectives. If you want to know why this is a very good thing, for the wolves, the land, and the elk, go back to my earlier wolf blogs where I go into more depth on that. To put it simply,
wolves = fewer, more scattered ungulates = stronger, more alert, genetically superior elk = less grazing = more intact ecosystems.

So, why wouldn't hunters want all of that; at least the part about genetically superior elk and more intact ecosystems? Well, hunters have lots of competition. As the hunter prizes that trophy elk, so does Mr. Bear, Mr. Wolf, Mr. Other Hunter and good old Mother Nature. And, this just makes a hunter uneasy about his chances. To Mr. Hunter, superior elk and good ecosystems are all fine and good, as long as he's just about guaranteed to get to shoot one of those superior elk.

Guaranteed? Oh yes. And he'll talk about this issue, as if it's his God-given right to kill an elk and hang it on his wall. And he'll talk about how he and his buddies have laid some sort of claim to the elk in the mountains and, thus, should have more to say about it than anyone else. A God-given right? Really? A freaking guarantee? Hmm....I don't remember that part of the Constitution. I don't remember reading or hearing about this guarantee, ever. I do believe that God gave man the beasts of the field to sustain himself. However, there was never a guarantee, or a right, or a claim of ownership over the elk. No, I believe those are God's elk, just as we are God's children, all of us sharing God's earth. Now I'm getting to religious and that's not a good way to prove anything. Back on track...

About that imagined claim of more right to influence wildlife policies, the hunters will tell you about how more of the money they spend on hunting tags, etc...goes into habitat restoration and game management programs. As far as I understand it, they are correct, and that their money is spent on habitat preservation, restoration, etc...is commendable, by itself. But then, in order to fully respect that, one ought to ask why would hunters spend money on habitat and lobbying the way they do. Do they just love the elk and deer? Are they simply fascinated by the ungulates and never want to see them vanish? Do they believe elk and deer were meant to roam the mountains around us? Well, perhaps; it might be a small factor. But what if nothing was in it for the hunter? What if there was no hunting allowed? What if there was no guarantee? Would they still spend their money on habitat preservation and making sure the elk and deer populations thrived? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say NO, they would not. They've shown that what they ultimately want, that great motivating force behind their good deeds, is that they want to kill those elk and deer. They pay their dues so they can kill things. Many of them don't care what; put a living, breathing mammal in front of them and they'll kill it and then pose for a photo with it and then maybe get the thing stuffed and put on the wall.
(By the way, in terms of pure dollars related to wildlife, for every $1 spent by hunters/fishers in Utah, $2 is spent by people just hoping to SEE wildlife.)

Maybe it's just me but, "to hunt" implies having to look around, to scout, to stalk, and maybe to work really hard IN HOPES of finding what you're looking for. If you hunt something, you obviously don't know if that thing is there; you are simply looking for it; no guarantee. Today's "hunting" philosophy: 4WD truck, 4WD 4 wheeler with a winch, camoflauge everything, trail cameras, high powered rifle, high powered scope, paid guides, private property, spending WAY more money for that guarantee than what you'd spend on meat at the store, etc...The truck will maybe get you close enough for a shot; the 4wheeler will get you even closer and will carry out your kill for you; the high-powered rifle will put you "within range" at over a mile away; the high-powered scope will get you even closer; you'll quench that blood lust before you even squeeze the trigger; the guides will take you right to the place where they've been watching the same trophy animal, every day, for months; the trail cam will do your hunting for you so you won't have to move a muscle; all of that "hunting" will assure you that you'll win the pissing contest between all the other hunters on a given year. By the same logic behind the anti-wolf lobby, we ought to kill all bears, kill all wolves, kill all trees--easier to see the elk, make it illegal for any hunter's path to go in an uphill direction; much easier to walk downhill. No, let's take that even further; it should be illegal, come hunting season, for any elk to remain hidden up in the mountains; by law they should be forced out of the hills and within 10 feet of all major valley roads. No, that's not right; it ought to be the law that once an animal has been chosen by the hunter, it must jump into the back of the hunter's truck where it would then be shot dead. Wait, no; only shot to maim itself, so it could go ahead and gut and skin itself on the way to the taxidermist, where it could then finally die. Trophy hunters are practically hunting on farms anyway; everything is basically a canned hunt these days. They don't want fair chase; they don't want it to be difficult; they want it to be as easy as possible to bag an elk with a bigger rack than the one over at the neighbor's house. See where I'm heading with this yet?

To a wolf, hunting means hunting. They know there's no guarantee of a kill. The only guarantee they have is that, if they don't eat, they won't survive. The average wolf is about 95lbs. They don't have guns, they don't have scopes, they don't have trucks nor 4 wheelers. They have 4 legs on which they must run and beat their prey. They have to out wit an elk to win. They fail miserably on the majority of hunting attempts. But their survival depends on them succeeding some of the time. To bump their chances at all, they generally go after the young or the very old, the sick and the weak, leaving the strongest animals--those with the best health and genetics--to survive and pass on their traits. The way wolves hunt and survive will benefit elk populations, habitat, and vast ecosystems leaps and bounds more than will the high paying, guarantee seeking hunter.

Why do the hunters want to get rid of the wolves? It's not because they simply love the elk and deer and moose. It's their love of killing the elk, deer, and moose that drives them. Trophy hunters kill wolves so they can kill some more.
To a wolf, hunting means hunting. They know there's no guarantee of a kill. The only guarantee they have is that, if they don't eat, they won't survive.

Stuff, including Nature Saturday

2011-05-15T22:22:00.003-06:00

From Nature Saturday, this was a snow slide across the canyon road. Had to hike the bike over it. I had anticipated it, but thought once I crossed it, I could ride my bike up the road to a favorite trailhead. I was wrong, as most of the road the rest of the way was covered in snow. I finally ditched the bike and just hiked it, which was more relaxing, actually and I was able to take in the beautiful surroundings, rather than just be huffing and puffing trying to pedal up that steep canyon. Anyway, this bike is one of my favorites. It's 20 years old; I bought it barely used in 1995.
This was a couple of weeks ago. We had taken my son to the pond to feed the ducks. I remember my mom taking me and my siblings to the pond to feed the ducks. It just seems natural to take my son there. He loves it. But there was this badass seagull that drug a fish up the shore and was tearing it up. I always say nature isn't always pretty, but then again, it is.
For our 5 year anniversary, big spenders we are, we drove 3 hours down to Capitol Reef, a national park in Utah which is quickly becoming a favorite destination for me. It was beautiful as always, albeit cold and windy. Wish my pics would have turned out better; I didn't have he patience in that wind though. Still, a great trip.
Egyptian Temple, Capitol Reef Nat'l Park, UT
While driving down a dirt road on the south end of the park, we stopped, very randomly to look at some plants. There's rock and cliffs to climb on everywhere you go. I climbed up this rock and found what must be some Fremont Indian ruins. Sort of a makeshift shelter under a huge boulder and, if you look closely, you'll see old corn cobs. A very cool find.
Just some prettiness of the West Desert, Simpson Springs, UT area.

Nature.....Monday?

2011-05-09T23:29:00.003-06:00

I LOVE days like this, and there's no place that makes me feel more at home on a rainy day than Santaquin Canyon; like being in Alaska again!

Up Santaquin Canyon, there's this part of the narrow road that becomes a one-way across a bridge, under which the river switches to the north side of the road, where a snow slide almost always comes down. This year is no exception, with near record snow pack in the Wasatch Range. I love that stuff like this happens!
Here's the lower end of the avalanche; hard to tell, but the river is raging this week. It was scary walking across that little land bridge made of snow; the thought of it giving way while I crossed with my camera had my heart racing. But sometimes, you've got to earn your good times.
I'm a sucker for shots like this, probably because it takes some manipulation of your camera settings and you can set it up so many different ways. And to me, this is way better quality than that one on the wall at the Chinese restaurant.
Not as pretty but, more of that.
Was a beautiful day for a drive!

Nature Sundays Vol. III

2011-04-24T10:01:00.002-06:00

Well, it's Easter Sunday. It was about 35 degrees this morning. I thought about sleeping in, but once I woke up at 6:15, I was up for good. Kinda glad, too. There's so much you miss by sleeping in, as far as nature goes. And sometimes, God rewards those who get out there and take in all that He created. Or, so I believe.

I was driving around, just looking for some good landscapes. I had missed the fact that there was wildlife out this morning. I was lucky this pair of sandhill cranes stuck around long enough for me to spot them from the road. They're so pretty. To some people, bird watching is for old people in shorts that are way to short for them, and big binoculars hung around their necks. But I enjoy watching them, especially because so many of them hang in breeding pairs. And two birds for a photo are almost always better than one.
I wish I could have composed this better. I stumbled around in the grass, and the shallow puddles, trying to find a better angle, but was unsuccessful. Still, it's worthy of Nature Sunday.
Ah, big, beautiful Timpanogas. I have a special place for it, in my heart, especially after climbing it last September. It was actually a pretty hard hike. (Who knew my knees would be so sensitive to the climb up and down?) But there's so much to see up there. I'd be tempted to climb it again this year. And I may. I'll probably try to get up Nebo first though. Just thought this was a pretty scene this morning, on my way back into town.
I've shot these before, and this, by no means, is a very artistic shot. I just like looking at the wind towers. Especially with Earth Day having been yesterday, it makes me smile to think of this, and other projects like it, where man is finally realizing the potential for clean, renewable energy resources.
I've taken many pictures of hawks before, but couldn't resist trying to capture this one. He/she was pretty willing just to sit there while I did my best with a cheap 300mm to get a closer glimpse. I wonder how many mice or squirrels he's tried to catch and eat this morning.
If I were a horse, I'd definitely prefer a home like this, to a little stall in someone's tiny yard.
It's Spring time and the deer are out enjoying the new green food source on the ground. These ones are starting to scrape off their winter undercoats. They always look so scrappy in the Spring. With all of the deer I saw on the hillsides, browsing the brush and the ground, I couldn't help but think there was a mountain lion, or two, watching and waiting for a good Easter meal. Mountain lions are about the only animal that scare me. I'm uneasy knowing that I'll probably never see one before it sees me. That said, I've spent hours and days in lion country and have never seen one, or had a run-in with one. I have seen their tracks; I've even seen their tracks in my tracks--made the hairs on my neck stand right up. But they are beautiful and I'd love the chance to see one through my camera lens. One day...

Nature Sunday Apr. 17, 2011 Edition

2011-04-18T00:07:00.004-06:00

I'm about 11 or 12 minutes late getting this up on Sunday. But at least I'm trying to be true to my intentions and sticking with the Nature Sundays entries for a 2nd consecutive week, right? Well, I didn't exactly get out and about, but when I went to feed my dog, I took the camera, and decided to capture a few evidences of the Spring season.

Pookah and I took off for a little walk toward the orchard. This pic was taken about 5 minutes after she killed one of my brother's chickens :( And I had just told my brother she wouldn't do it if I was with her. I knew there were chickens ahead, but I didn't worry too much. I had just looked down long enough to turn my camera on and then saw that Pookah was already chasing a hen and I couldn't get her to call off the chase. Ugh. Poor chicken!
The buds are on the trees in the orchards. These are buds on a cherry tree; soon to be beautiful blossoms.
These little things will eventually become yummy apples!
This is Mt. Loafer. It's sort of how I know I'm home. It's always been there, in that pretty corner of Southeast Utah Valley. It's always made a nice backdrop for the apple trees in this orchard. Still quite a lot of snow up there, especially for mid-April. I'm sort of exited to see the rivers and streams raging with Spring melt water. (Keep your cameras handy; it might get REALLY, INTENSELY good in a couple of weeks when the temps rise into the 70s for days at a time.) I don't wish anyone's home to be ruined in a flood or a landslide, but if there is flooding and landslides, you can be sure I'm going to be there, looking at the mess through my lens.

Happy Spring time, Everyone!

Nature Sundays...

2011-04-10T15:06:00.002-06:00

I MIGHT begin a weekly blog post called Nature Sundays. It will be short and sweet; I'll just post a photo from my weekly Sunday morning drives. Here's one from today's drive; it's near Utah Lake State Park, Provo.

Nearly every Sunday morning, I wake up--even though sometimes I'd like to sleep in--and go on a nice drive. I have a few favorite routes and destinations. Where I end up just depends on how much time I have. Today, I didn't have a lot of time, so I took my dog and drove over to Utah Lake. I love the cat tails and the reeds in the shallows. Always so brilliantly colored. I little flock of ducks flew up and I was lucky enough to capture them in this shot, though I only made them one element of the shot, not the main subject.

I love many things about this Sunday ritual; I love that early morning cup of chai from Joe's. It was extra good this morning, as I woke with a touch of a sore throat. The music is good on Sunday mornings; I like to listen to KRCL 90.9 FM, which has "The Circle of Life" on from 6AM til 10AM Sundays. It's all Native American music. I rarely understand the words, but it's usually very spiritual, and whether you're Native American, or just a White dude, if you try, you can feel the spirit of that music. I love the quiet of Sunday mornings; no traffic, almost anywhere. You really feel like you can get away from all of the unwanted noises in life. I took my dog, Puka, this morning. She loves to get out and run and sniff around a new place. This was her first time by the Utah Lake State Park, and she was extra excited to explore. And I had promised her yesterday that I'd take her for a ride today, so I had to make good on that, even though it'd be easier for me to get around without her. I'll bet we look funny, me in the driver's seat, and her, riding shotgun, in the front seat of my blue work van. We do get some funny looks.

Anyway, it was a good morning; still cold; still fighting the inevitability of warm and hot weather. I know so many of you are hoping and praying for sunny skies and warmer temperatures. For me, I'll take the cold. The longer the upper 90s and 100 degree temps stay away, the better. But I know they're coming, which is why I'm not hurrying them here.

Have a great day, Everyone! Peace.

30 lbs of SASS!

2011-03-31T21:03:00.002-06:00

He can appear so sweet; And he is. But the older he gets, and especially lately, the sassier he gets. I guess we kind of expected that from our 2 year old.
And even with the sassiness, I wish he'd never grow up. He's such a handsome little guy.
This is totally posed. I mean, I was trying to get him all psyched about potty training. Daddy likes a magazine, so little boy wanted a magazine. He was very cute there, looking at his magazine, pants down around his ankles, and sitting on the potty. But this was taken 6 weeks ago; he's still very much in diapers.

Ah, we love our little boy. He really is the light of our lives.

Nature isn't always pretty...or is it?

2011-03-23T16:36:00.005-06:00

For so many of us, getting out and enjoying nature is a must. If I don't get up in the mountains, even just to admire God's handy work, at least once a week, I start to get the blues. I love nature. I feel like I get to know my God when I'm out in the wilderness. I love to see the wild flowers blooming from late Spring and into Summer. I love the smell; there's no comparison between the smell of mountain air and the smell of the Wasatch Front inversions we have to breath each Winter. The skies in the mountains are clearer. Getting out of "it all" for even just a few hours is so freeing. I mean, you can scream in the trees and no one will hear you. You can talk to yourself. You can talk with God. You can really get inside yourself. At least, that's been my experience.
And it's officially Springtime now. It's time to get out and enjoy it all. I love the first few trips into the mountains every year; after the Winter and trying to stay warm and dry indoors, the outdoors seem brand new to me. Sort of makes me feel like a kid. (A lot of things make me fee like a kid though, not the least of which is my own immaturity. Haha.)
Anyway, I've been going up to one of the places I love this time of year and watching this moose I found a month or so ago. He's been in this general area for at least that long, which isn't exactly typical. The reason: he has an injury on his back right leg. Every weekend I go back to see him, and every weekend he's managed to move a little farther up the river. But he's always where I can find him. And still, he refuses to let that back right leg touch the ground; he won't put any weight on it. Poor thing. An acquaintance of mine told me that the DWR knows about the moose, and she's mad as the dickens that they won't just put the poor thing down and out of his misery. Thing is, he seems to be an otherwise healthy animal. He appears to have enough access to food, as I can tell he's gaining weight. As well, his antlers are just starting to bud out from his head, which is indicative of sufficient nutrition. But he still seems to have a lot of pain with that leg; he's so careful with it while he browses the willows. He's lucky, I guess, not to have any predators in that area; I can't imagine a mountain lion being crazy enough to take on an adult moose. And the coyotes up there know they couldn't kill him, though they may be waiting for him to die one day. I suppose a hunter might shoot him this year. For now though, I'm just enjoying getting to look at such a majestic animal; I've managed to shoot him with my camera from as close as 20 yards. (And only that close because I'm up an embankment and know he couldn't catch me.) I always make sure not to bother him. If he keeps his ears pinned back, I know he's getting stressed out by my presence and I'll back off and drive up the road in search of something else to see. And I've been careful not to attract attention to him or myself. (As a tour guide in Alaska, I know how wildlife sightings can make people lose their minds for a moment. Imagine 3 jackasses trying to hike up to a grizzly bear in Denali because they didn't have zoom lenses. Ugh.)
Anyway, while I feel bad for the moose and his hurt leg, and his seemingly lonely and unsure existence, I know that nature isn't always pretty. Then again, I look at the photos I was able to get of him and I think, "Wow, what a beautiful and amazing animal!"

14-year-old accidentally shot at Salt Lake mobile home park - ksl.com

2011-03-04T22:52:00.000-07:00

14-year-old accidentally shot at Salt Lake mobile home park - ksl.com
Another tragedy via gun accident.

Some days, I'm just not in the mood...

2011-02-23T09:48:00.004-07:00

So, I've got this huge, six section physics exam this week. The last day I can take it will be Friday. Last week, I was prepping for it; using every spare minute I had to study everything from unit conversions to 1 dimensional linear motion to gravity, to friction forces to 2 and 3 dimensional motion, to....Ugh!!! Point is, I was doing it and feeling pretty good about it. Then, I had a long weekend.
Today is my first day back at school since the break. I made it to physics, though at 7:50AM, ten minutes late. I didn't want to listen to the lecture; honestly, it doesn't matter if you listen or not; you'll still have to study. I was distracted; reading the news online. (Ten or twenty years ago, who would have thought you could take a portable computer to class and use it as a TV?) Then, some lady in class was coughing incessantly; she always does, but today it was finally bothering me. Why the hell are you coming to class, spreading your germs? You KNOW you can just read the chapter and get more than you'll get in the lecture. Does she not think she's being the slightest bit inconsiderate of the rest of us; those of us with intact immune systems, but still susceptible to whatever bug she's throwing around?
Now, instead of being in the tutor lab, where I really should be, I'm sitting in the cafeteria, blogging. What can I say? I was hungry; didn't eat breakfast before I came to school this morning. And anyway, who can eat breakfast at 6AM? It's impossible, I tell you. Well, I've now eaten breakfast, but I am bothered by the fact that the lady at the register asked if I had one egg or two? She KNOWS those are powdered eggs; how the hell am I supposed to count that?!?! As I'm sitting here, near the TV (I can't see it, I'm always too far to the side, but I can hear it), listening to how the Jazz just traded Deron Williams to the Nets, I'm getting cranky. And what's up with that guy that walked by a few minutes ago, looking generally in my direction, and seemingly mouthing "F*ck You?" Probably just my imagination, but what if it wasn't? Does he hate my shirt? My hat? My face? Hey man, how about F*ck You!?!?!
This blend of Pepsi and Dr. Pepper is good though; bubbly and tasty, as well as super-caffeinated. I need that today. I need my mood altered. I need a different state-of-mind than the one I had an hour ago. Does that mean I just did drugs? I don't know; probably. Probably broke the Word of Wisdom, too. Nah, not really. At least not in the way I understand it. I actually think God doesn't mind that I drink caffeine, especially if it means I'll more easily be able to love my neighbor.
Hmmm.....I wonder what to blog about next time. Hopefully how I got an A on my physics exam. Was this too ornery? Was it too cynical? I warned you of that in the title though. Did you like it anyway? I feel better. I guess that's the point.
I realize that a picture of that golden eagle doesn't have anything to do with today's blog topic. But I like to include my photos, and it's the only thing I photographed over the weekend. Spread your wings and fly, people. That's inspiring, right?

Ugh...and he's a democrat, too...

2011-02-18T07:44:00.001-07:00

http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/17/montana-governor-authorizes-wolf-kills/?hpt=T2

This is heavy-handed, indeed. Take a deep breath, Montana.

Rocky Barker: Are wolves still ‘non-essential’ in the West? | Local News | Idaho Statesman

2011-02-14T16:58:00.000-07:00

Rocky Barker: Are wolves still ‘non-essential’ in the West? | Local News | Idaho Statesman
The Obama administration had better do this right, if they want my support in 2012.

GOP budget bill lifts wolf protections - ksl.com

2011-02-14T11:23:00.000-07:00

GOP budget bill lifts wolf protections - ksl.com

This will be OK, as long as the states are responsible with control over this species (Don't count on it). If Idaho, Wyoming and Utah would follow Montana's model and example, I'd be more comfortable.
But the GOP and anti-wolfers should be aware; The second you abuse this, it will be right back in the courts, and power will remain with the feds. The pro-wolf community has plenty of money.

Young lovers w/ Caribbean tans

2011-02-14T10:27:00.008-07:00

Yeah, I know; this location gets overplayed. But it's literally right outside my apartment so, how can I not use it?
Vintage car, vintage guitar, look how incredibly in love they are!

You can't go wrong with water as your background, no matter what pond water looks like under a microscope.
They should have had a place like this to go with your girlfriend in high school. Who would have ever found you?
Him: Did that hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When YOU fell down from Heaven? You know, cuz you look just like an angel.
This couple just got engaged, and just got back from a Caribbean cruise. Of course, they had perfect tans, while the rest of us were becoming ghostly white in our........what's the opposite of tropical paradise? Anyway, I LOVED shooting them. I rarely had to pose them. They just got in front of the camera took over. Great shoot.

So........I haven't blogged about school for awhile. How's that going, you ask? Well, let's say today is a bad case of the Mondays for me. I arrived at school 2 hours late. Actually, this has more to do with me NOT being able to wait to edit yesterday's photo shoot, so I was up until 1AM. That's not a good idea when you have to be in class at 7:30AM the following morning. Oh well, this way, it's done and I can study all week for my Physics midterm exam. I also have a Botany quiz in a little over an hour. I think I'm OK there. I'll need about a 20 min cram session just before I tackle that one.
School is going pretty well, all in all. I don't like physics any more than I thought I would. I will be glad to delete about 90% of it from my brain after the semester. Since I only have to take the GRE for grad school and not the mCAT, I'm not going to need any physics. (I'm sure it will help that I understand the basics when I get to P.A. school.) But the semester has been OK. Still adjusting a bit; I haven't found a great way to balance watching my son and studying while my wife works at night. We'll get there. It's a tough balance. I need to do homework. But I feel like I owe it to my son to play with him and be an involved father. Plus, I LOVE that kid and it's hard to ignore him for any length of time suitable for homework.
The weather is looking very Spring-like. As much as I NEED the 4 seasons, I am looking forward to Spring and those very comfortable 60 degree temps. I can't wait to get out and play a bit more.

Finally, it's Valentine's Day today. So, hug/kiss/fondle/squeeze somebody. And to my sweet wife: I love you, Baby!

Sex and the Single Mormon

2011-02-11T10:16:00.001-07:00

http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/lifestyle/51222978-80/church-says-lds-sex.html.csp
I thought this was a good article from the Salt Lake Tribune.

Feds give early approval to wolf kills in Idaho | Idaho Outdoors | Idaho Statesman

2011-02-11T10:01:00.000-07:00

Feds give early approval to wolf kills in Idaho | Idaho Outdoors | Idaho Statesman

Panel: wolves not endangered - ksl.com

2011-02-11T09:55:00.000-07:00

Panel: wolves not endangered - ksl.com

Pics from the last week

2011-02-09T09:48:00.004-07:00

It was such a nice, sunny day; Jericho and I went for a nice walk around our quaint downtown neighborhood. We took pictures, stepped in dog poo, and splashed in the puddles. And we couldn't do any of it, of course, without Jericho's best friend, "Po Bo." (Or so he believes).
I did a portrait session for a friend of mine, with his wife and son. I've known Robert for a few years. We used to train MMA together. They all were excellent subjects with their pretty eyes and winning smiles.
His little boy was a total ham for the camera, though he would get tired of me often and would need to take a break to play with Jericho's toys.
Such a nice Mommy/son shot.
This is our street. I wish Main Street was just a little more bustling with people and shoppers. The quiet is nice though.
This is a shot I did, with the help of my wife, to go with an article in the UVU paper. It didn't make it in though; instead, they used a lame cartoon.

Wolves = T. Rex resurrected?

2011-02-09T09:35:00.003-07:00

http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/home/51216243-76/act-anti-comeback-destroy.html.csp

I'm am disgusted with the Director of Natural Resources for Utah, Michael Styler. His comments show a lack of real knowledge of the issue, and a real bias for ranchers and "sportsmen," and against wolves and other natural predators.

He either knows nothing, or he has an agenda.

The Low Anthem - Charlie Darwin (LIve on Later with Jools Holland 20/11/...

2011-01-25T22:13:00.001-07:00

I shared this on facebook; It's just too good not to share here. One of the greatest live performances of ANYTHING I've ever seen.

I've not much to say...

2011-01-22T23:50:00.004-07:00

This is Jericho and his cousin wearing a couple of my hats. Handsome little fellas.
I'm sure this was his favorite position in his mommy's tummy, too. Here he is watching Toy Story. And of course, it wouldn't be a good time without "Pobo," his polar bear. (We've had it since before he was born. Was a gift from one of his honorary uncles.)
I feel kind of bad now, looking at this one. I actually WANTED him to bawl like crazy on Santa's lap. For some reason, I thought that would make the classic first Santa photo. And it does. But I still feel bad. Look at the poor kid!
Jericho's affinity for all things Toy Story. He now has a Buzz costume. A few Woody toys, and too many Buzz Lightyear toys to count.
Just lying on Grandpa and Grandma's lawn on a Summer evening. I miss his long hair. We've cut his hair two or three times. We both agree it makes him look so grown up, which we sort of don't love. I'm fighting for letting him grow the long hair again.
Jericho and Grandma's kitty, Teeny.
What a cool kid.

Anyway, I just didn't have much to say this week about school. It came and went this week. Fridays still suck, with a 10 1/2 hour day inside the confinements of UVU. This week's Physics lessons were a little more difficult to grasp. I know it is only going to get harder as the semester moves on. I guess I've got to learn to love studying; I am, however, looking forward to the day when I can forget maybe 80% of what I'm learning this semester.

Well, here's to hoping for a great upcoming week; yours and mine.

A NEW-OLD CHAPTER

2011-01-16T23:47:00.004-07:00

I hate my lack of stick-to-it-ive-ness; I started this blog a few years ago and tried to keep it as a bit of a journal; didn't really work. I used to keep a real journal; I wasn't very consistent with it either. The bad part is coming back to it and realizing how much you've missed; how much you should have written down; how much you'd like to tell people about the past goings on in your life. Well, I'm not planning on "catching you up" in this entry. I'll add things, here and there, to fill in the lost times when I feel it necessary. For now, I'm going to try and keep up on this thing.

I'm sort of starting a new chapter in my life, both out of choice and necessity. And, it's sort of an old chapter, too. I have completed 90 credit hours of college studies, which is about 30 short of a bachelor's degree. I think I've started and then stopped about 3 or 4 times along the way. My biggest distraction from school has been the one I regret the least; Alaska. I let it keep me away from school for 6 or 7 years, and have loved every second. (You should maybe know that getting back up there permanently is a goal of mine, one which I don't intend to give up.) At any rate, I'm back at UVU, studying for a BS in biology, with which I'll apply to do a Physician Assistant Master's degree in a year or 2.

My life is changing. I was just getting settled in on my situation as it was; Married. Father of one. Finish Carpenter. Home owner. Truth be told, I never dreamed of being a finish carpenter, though I've liked it OK; It's good to be able to fix stuff on your own house, rather than hiring someone else. But I was letting go of a prior goal to work in the field of medicine, which would require schooling. Well, life happens. Sometimes it kicks you right in the head. And hard.

When the economy tanked a couple of years ago, the housing and construction industry went in the toilet with it. I've maybe had 2 weeks in the last 2 or 3 years where I actually logged 40 hours with my employer. My wife's work is steady, luckily. She's an RN, working in an emergency room. People always get hurt, get sick, or want a fix of pain meds so, she stays gainfully employed. I've tried to supplement my income by doing portrait photography and carpentry side work. I don't charge enough for photography though. And the side jobs don't come around often enough. The simple truth is that this recession has put the hurt on me and thus, my family.

We've tried staying afloat; keeping our heads just above water, sometimes going under. We've grinded it out for a while. It's a very bad feeling when you're trying to provide for your family and failing miserably; watching your wife work and live on no sleep because there's a 2 year old to tend and feed, while you're working to no avail. We began realizing we were in a battle we couldn't win, with a mortgage way higher than it should be, and other debts here and there. Oh, I think we could maybe try even harder, wear ourselves out just to try and pay bills, but to what end? At some point, all you do is work; you sort of throw away your joy. I HATE that. I believe you have to have joy. You don't have to be rich. You don't have to have nice cars or a big house. But you have to be able to enjoy life and your loved ones. And we've been on a road, seemingly careening for a miserable existence.

My wife and I finally had a heart to heart about our future; not about us, together; but about our future, financially. It was a tough choice, but we put the house up for sale, and began working on getting me ready to go back and finish school. The house has been on the market since like August. It's not a hot market for a seller. We've been trying for a short-sale. (The bank agrees to sell it for less than the loan, as an alternative to foreclosure--usually better for all involved.) The short sale hasn't been going too well. A couple of offers--too low, said the bank. And they're putting the pressure on us like crazy, threatening foreclosure. So far, our financial future isn't looking too bright. (We're hoping and praying for a miracle right now. And someone is negotiating for it at the moment, which is a glimmer of hope.)

A month or so ago, we moved out, planning on a would-be buyer to close on the house. (Didn't happen that time). Anyway, we moved to a charming 2 bedroom apartment in this 150 year old building downtown. It's cheap enough and it works for us. I miss having a garage to park the cars in, especially during snow. But I don't miss the stress. As far as I'm concerned, we're home. We've got each other, we've got a roof over our heads, food in our bellies, and we're generally happy. You see, this way, we get to enjoy being a little family, rather than grinding it out, figuring out how just to survive another month.

Don't misread me; I'm still stressed out about the house. I hate that I can't just pay for it. I hate that this has felt, at times, like such a step backward. And, the worst-case scenario is pretty bad; foreclosure is not good on your credit; it plagues you for years to come. But my wife and I agree that it's nearly out of our control. We cannot pay for it. And we both believe that keeping me in school, to finish this time, is the right route. So, whatever comes of the house, we're moving forward. We'll somehow come out on the other side and be better for it. Right?

Anyway, this is my blog for the next few years; 3 or 4 years of the adventures in the life of a poor, thirty-something, part-time worker, full-time student. I hope you enjoy it. I really hope I enjoy it. A couple of weeks into the semester, a couple of quizzes gone by, and I am a straight-A student. I even have an A+ in Botany because of a bonus question. I'm not naive enough to think any of that will be easy to maintain. But it's my job now. Wish me luck, will you?

ksl.com - Man critically injured in accidental shooting

2010-11-29T16:57:00.000-07:00

ksl.com - Man critically injured in accidental shooting

Obama vs Truman

2010-11-23T18:05:00.001-07:00

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ari-emanuel/post_1308_b_786617.html I hope the author of this article is correct. I'll look back and read this again in another 2 years.

2010-10-20T12:57:00.000-06:00

I guess I'm not very original...

2010-10-09T16:10:00.000-06:00

ksl.com - Bill would exempt wolves from federal protection

2010-09-30T23:37:00.000-06:00

ksl.com - Bill would exempt wolves from federal protection

My Islamic Queries...

2010-09-25T14:20:00.008-06:00

OK. Some of you may have been aware that I wanted to do this one for a while. Hopefully my attempt to do it doesn't fail. But here you go:

It's began to die down by this point but, for the last several months, there has been great interest and media attention given to Muslims; There have been many stories and videos in the media, especially regarding the "mosque at Ground Zero," and the crazy pastor in Florida who threatened to have a Quran burning. For what ever reason, I was so intrigued by all of this. And my gut reactions seemed to continuously change with each new media from which I heard the stories.

You had the people at CNN and MSNBC taking the "liberal" stance, portraying those opposed to the mosque, and those supporting the Quran burnings as whack jobs. And then you had FoxNews doing their best, right in character, of spreading the fear of a Muslim/Islamic uprising and takeover of the world. And, it's pretty easy, if you're the talking heads, to spread that fear, especially in the midst of an economic crisis, where everyone's nerves are raw, and everyone looks for someone to blame. At some point, I had to conclude that I can't trust the media. I mean, Glenn Beck, Sarah Palin, Keith Olbermann, Rachel Maddow, and Sean Hannity aren't Muslim, so why was I trying to get my information about Islam from them? Ironically, Hannity had me so confused because, when it came to the Quran burnings, he had, out of nowhere, began going out of his way to make great distinction between "mainstream Muslims," and "Islamic extremists." I decided to ditch all of them on the matter.

As for the so-called mosque at Ground Zero, my first instinct was to say, "No way in hell should there be a mosque there. It's too soon; not the right time; people are still angry, sad, at a loss." I wouldn't want anyone's Constitutional rights taken away, and I knew the imam in NY had the right to build his mosque or whatever it was. (A multi-faith community center, built by Muslims.) But I also felt, and still do to an extent, that it may not be the most sensitive of moves. After all, the 9/11 hijackers were Muslim, right?

And what about that Floridian pastor who wanted to do a Quran burning? Actually, I wanted his right of freedom of speech protected. I thought he should be able to do that if he wanted. In my opinion, Islam is not untouchable. There have been many a bible, many a U.S. flag burned both in the U.S. and out. It doesn't make me that mad. Is it disrespectful though? Probably. In the end, I'm glad the pastor didn't burn the Qurans. I'm glad the president urged him not to do it, in the interest of not adding fuel to any extremists' fires; in the interest of not adding more risk to our already overly at risk military men and women.

All of this hubbub had me wondering what my firm stance was. Am I afraid of Muslims? Does the Quran really tell Muslims to kill Jews and Christians? Would the mosque at Ground Zero be a "victory mosque?" Is there a big movement toward Islamic Supremacy in the world?

Having no Muslim friends; really knowing no one who's Muslim, I decided I couldn't really be fairly informed on this matter. I thought back to my life, maybe 15 years ago when I didn't know any gay people or have any gay friends. I was pretty homophobic. That all went away very quickly when I met some gay people who have become some of my best friends in the world. It was irrational and wrong of me to be homophobic. I'm so thankful for my friends and all they've taught me. You all know who you are and know that I think the world of you and my friendship with you. Some of the greatest examples of good people I've ever known. Anyway, I realized that I needed to go meet some Muslims and see if I could ask them some questions. So, about a week ago, I found a mosque online and contacted them. My contact was to the director of the Utah Islamic Society. He's also a professor at a prominent Utah University. Because he declined my request for an on-camera interview (he's not a big youtube fan) I'll respect his privacy and not mention his name in this public setting. He told me he's not so prominent a figure---although from what I saw at the mosque, he is---he didn't necessarily want me quoting him, although he said I could use any of the information he gave me. Anyway, we set up an interview at the mosque for yesterday. I was so excited, a little nervous too. But mostly glad for the chance to have such an experience.
I'll be paraphrasing our conversation as best I can. I recorded my notes onto a voice recorder immediately after the interview, and just before I went to the prayer meeting to which I was invited.

1) Do political generalizations, such as Mormons voting Republican seem to apply to American Muslims?
He suspects that, in keeping with many minority classes in the U.S., that most Muslims would probably lean toward voting Democrat, more so than Republican. He said that, while he voted for Gore/Leibermann in 2000, most American Muslims voted for Bush and for Ralph Nader, based on Leibermann being Jewish. (We'll get into that later.) He urged his friends and fellow Muslims not to take the vote from Gore/Leibermann, based on religion but he suspects that's what they did.

2) Who is God, and what is God's role?
Muslims are the most monotheistic. God is the creator of all things. But God didn't need a son, or a partner. He is simply God, able to do anything and everything he wants. He was able to put a baby inside Mary simply by willing it so. He didn't need to make a son. They call God "Allah." And he will be our judge.
3) To Muslims, what is appealing about America, or what would make them want to move/live here?
Muslims here want to be individualistic, having individual, guaranteed rights, which isn't the case in Muslim countries. They value democracy and value having a voice. They value freedom and liberty. So, while there seems to be plenty about America which angers some Muslims in the world, they DON'T hate freedom, as some heads of state have tried to strongly suggest.

4) How are Muslims "converted," or can they be?
He didn't really get into a spiritual conversion, to which I was trying to lead him. He simply said, Muslims must believe in God. They must believe in all the prophets up to Mohammed. They accept all scripture, in it's original and purest forms, to be God's word. (I don't have to mention that this doesn't include the Book of Mormon, do I?) It includes the Old and New Testaments, The Torah, and the Quran. Then a person can recite a prayer, after the imam, which takes about 2 minutes. It's very informal/non-ceremonial. Then they can be considered Muslim.

5) What is it about America, Americans, or American government that the world's Muslims seem to resent, or even to hate?
This goes back to its roots in the Israel/Palestine conflict. With Israel ever expanding into Palestine, uprooting Muslims in order to grow their Jewish state. And the U.S. is seen as the world's greatest supporter of Israel, even after Israel commits atrocity after atrocity against Palestine. (Yes, I'm familiar that this fight goes both ways.)
Our foreign policies are often seen as offensive and/or oppressive to Muslims. We seem to do a lot of damage in Muslim lands. Americans do so much good in the world, regardless of who lives where, rebuilding, or giving aid to about any nation, regardless of whether or not its Muslim or whatever. But, we're often, as perceived by Muslims, found to be on the opposing teams from Muslim countries.
A good example is Iraq. After 9/11, we went to Iraq with the majority of our forces. We were sold the war on "good intelligence" that there were WMDs. After that justification failed, we were told that Saddam was evil and needed to be removed. No one disputes that Saddam was a bad guy, but there are bad guys, equally as evil, around the world so, why Iraq? Then we were told we were spreading freedom and democracy. Eventually we were told that we had to protect interests, namely oil reserves in Iraq. And, in the process of all the good we've done in that region, how many tens or hundreds of thousands of innocent Muslims have been killed? Sure, we got rid of an evil dictator. But at what expense? We went into Afghanistan, with which most American Muslims agreed. But we still haven't gotten Bin Laden. And, again, we're in a Muslim region, killing the bad guys and also countless innocents.
So, many of the world's Muslims don't like U.S. foreign policy, as it relates to flexing our military muscle and sort of shaping the world and its people as we see fit.
(Remember Ron Paul's stance on this during the presidential debates? Still think he's a whacko, Mr. Hannity?)
That said, he made it clear that Islamic extremists are absolutely wrong. He said they could bring Al Quaida in, sit around a table with them, and prove, with the Quran, that they are absolutely wrong. As well, he pointed out that it isn't just America the terrorists hate. In fact, there have certainly been far more terrorist attacks, both plotted and carried out, in the rest of the world.

6) What is the Islamic view of the after-life?
There will come a day where the world will be filled with so much evil and transgression, and God will cleanse the earth, and we will all be judged according to our works and deeds, according to our knowledge of God's word. (Hmmm...not very different from Christianity at all.)

7) Is there an Islamic "holy day" during the week?
It happens to be Friday. On that day is their congregational prayer, where everyone comes to pray together. Muslims say 5 obligatory prayers every day, which they can do on their own if they wish. But on Friday, the congregational prayer must be done with everyone, at the mosque. They believe that on this day, their prayers have the best chance of being answered, (At the end of the interview, the director and the imam invited me to the prayer meeting. I was so honored to be able to participate in that. Well, I didn't actually pray with them. I sat in the back of this big, beautiful prayer room, behind all of the men as they prayed and listened to the imam's words. They even let me take photos, as you can see. It was a very spiritual atmosphere. And you could tell that those men have a bond with each other, even if they don't really know each other. I don't know if they just feel so great to be in the mosque, or if they're just happy to be amongst other people, with whom they share such a big part their lives. Where were the women, you ask? They were above, in a balcony. I couldn't see if they performed the same prayers, or if they just watched. Part of the prayer meeting lesson had to do with husband/wife relationships, and I got the impression that American Muslims are a little more "progressive" than those in Muslim countries. For instance, the imam said that wives should listen to their husbands, but also that they should "move on" if their husband was abusive and couldn't be a good man. The bulk of the lesson was about not just listening and hearing the words of Allah, but that Muslims should act and be true doers of Allah's word.)
8) Do you sympathize with those who protest the mosque at Ground Zero, based on that it would be "salt in their wounds?"
He said his thoughts on this had evolved. In the beginning, he thought, it's the wrong time; why do you want to stir things up, especially since Muslims have been living under a sort of fear since 9/11. He says whenever he hears that there's been an attack or a bomb or something, he hopes and prays it wasn't Muslims because of the repercussions on all Muslims, and not just on the few who commit such atrocities.
Now, he feels like, no, the imam in NY shouldn't back down. It's a multi-faith center. There was a mosque in the trade center. Most important, it's their constitutional right and, if they back down on this, they'll be asked more and more to give up their rights and eventually they'll be oppressed here in America. And if that happened, he'd then wish never to have come to America. (He's originally from Bangladesh.)
He brought up the point that, while Christians believe that it was the Jews who killed Jesus Christ, but America isn't kicking all of the Jews out of the country, nor telling Jews they can't build their synagogues in our "Christian nation," or Christian-majority towns. And, something I think is important to note; The U.S. didn't kick all Muslims out of the country after 9/11, which sort of suggests that even the same government who the right-wing Fox News supported, knew that not all Muslims are terrorists; In fact, very few, of the 1.5 billion are.

9) What is the difference between Sunni, and Shia?
About 90% of Muslims are Sunni. Only 10% are Shia. The division between the two is rooted in a history which should ring very familiar with Mormons. Before the prophet Mohammed died, he hadn't chosen a replacement, even though he knew he was sick. After his death, a small group of Muslims thought the replacement leader ought to be a blood relative or direct descendant of Mohammed. Most of the people disagreed and just wanted the people to be able to choose a new leader, regardless of blood relation. And thus, there became the division.
OK, so I gladly went to the congregational prayer service. It was more casual than I expected. Some men in casual, street clothes, some in more culturally traditional clothing. I had asked about the caps some wore, and was told it wasn't necessary. There is nothing that says it must be worn, but they feel that it more closely emulated Mohammed, which is nice if you want to sort of be more holy. I asked about the Turbans as well, and then felt ignorant, again. The turbans are worn all around the world, but they aren't a Muslim thing; that is to say, turbans have nothing to do with Islam. They're simply worn by many peoples of the world as a cultural article of clothing, not religous.
Anyway, back on topic. I already talked about the prayer meeting lesson back on question 7. But the meeting was nice. I definitely felt some sort of spiritual connection there. You can see the devotion in the way they all carry themselves, and in the way they seem so happy to be in that prayer meeting. I felt very welcomed, if a little odd for being the guy in the back of the room with the camera. Still, I was greeted with many smiles and several handshakes. Only one man did I see who gave me an odd, colder look. But that may have been geared more to my camera than to my simple presence. And I was told by the imam that I was welcome there anytime, and that he hoped I'd return again.
So, this was a very positive experience for me; I'm glad I did it. And I may well return to the mosque, and to my new friends Mr. Name kept private, and the imam of Khadeeja Mosque.

This security guy is from Yugoslavia. He said he'd been working security for the Islamic Society for 10 years. He was very friendly and actually asked me to take a picture of him for my project.
Here is the imam, greeting a woman, followed by her child, to the prayer service.

This is a photo of the mosque from the parking lot entrance. Kind of unexpected, especially since I just had no idea there was such a place in Utah.

ksl.com - Wolf kills 100-pound dog in Utah

2010-08-04T18:23:00.000-06:00

ksl.com - Wolf kills 100-pound dog in Utah

Latest family portrait shoot

2010-06-20T18:05:00.006-06:00

This is Kayden. His blue eyes became the subject of many of the photos this shoot.
Yeah, a suitcase on a beach doesn't make a ton of sense. But check out the cute kid inside!
Couldn't get him to stop doing his squat pose by this barn, so we just went with it.
Kayden, standing in front of his dad.
I can tell you, from having only spent a couple of hours with them, that this couple has a passion for each other.
What they would have looked like in the old days.
Love the color of this one; but I'm good enough to realize that I didn't frame it right; I didn't get the effect I wanted and so we will do them again soon.
Awesome barn. You'd have to be pretty tight with me to get its location out of me.

This is Justin and Jacey, and their icy-blue-eyed son, Kayden. (Hope I'm spelling his name correctly.) This was such a fun shoot; so fun, I've already offered to do a part II for them. They're a great-looking couple, both with fun personalities. I was sort of intimidated when they said they were bringing their one-year old son, because I just have a hard time getting kids that age to cooperate. But that handsome little kid arrived with a huge smile on his face to match his huge eyes and I think I got some killer shots of him. So, tell me what you think...

ksl.com - 3-year-old shot inside West Valley City home

2010-06-04T17:28:00.000-06:00

ksl.com - 3-year-old shot inside West Valley City home

ksl.com - Man accidentally shot in leg in Hooper

2010-05-03T21:38:00.000-06:00

ksl.com - Man accidentally shot in leg in Hooper

2010-04-18T22:22:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

2010-04-12T21:57:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

Silent epidemic - Salt Lake Tribune

2010-04-12T21:50:00.000-06:00

Silent epidemic - Salt Lake Tribune

2010-04-12T21:35:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

Arizona man arrested after gun fires at Walmart | Weird News | Idaho Statesman

2010-04-11T21:47:00.000-06:00

Arizona man arrested after gun fires at Walmart | Weird News | Idaho Statesman

Teen apparently shoots dad during target practice east of Boise | Boise, Garden City, Mountain Home | Idaho Statesman

2010-04-11T21:43:00.000-06:00

Teen apparently shoots dad during target practice east of Boise | Boise, Garden City, Mountain Home | Idaho Statesman

2010-03-31T22:39:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

2010-03-31T00:25:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

2010-03-31T00:17:00.001-06:00

share

Posted using ShareThis

Extended wolf timeline

2010-03-28T11:28:00.000-06:00

http://bozemandailychronicle.com/special-reports/article_3415155c-3a25-11df-9e52-001cc4c002e0.html

Latest thoughts and figures on Yellowstone wolves...

2010-03-28T11:19:00.000-06:00

http://bozemandailychronicle.com/news/article_dee9a77e-3a19-11df-9095-001cc4c002e0.html

Seems a fitting article right now...

2010-03-17T22:01:00.002-06:00

http://www.adn.com/2010/03/16/1186573/theres-a-good-reason-why-were.html

He's my boy!

2010-03-15T00:14:00.004-06:00

The neighbors' awesome truck is the first truck he's ever been into. Looks like he's a Ford guy.

Representing our street with an attitude.
It's gonna be a while before you can make a basket here Buddy.

This may be common in kids, as my friend says her kid did this too. But he LOVED getting up the curb, and then down the curb; and then up the curb, and then down the curb; and then up...
He definitely likes rocks.
Baby got his good looks from his beautiful momma. Lucky for him.
Innocent eyes.

Losing my best friend

2010-03-11T11:13:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, March 10, 2010, I lost my best friend of more than eleven years. His name was "Uintah's Foxy Jake," and he was my dog. He was an Alaskan Malamute and I adopted him when he was just 4 months old. We were nearly inseparable. He was such a good dog, so happy, fiercely loyal. He was my only friend, during a time in my life I don't wish to relive. But he was always there, giving me those eyes that said, "I'm here friend. Tell me what I can do to help." He was definitely an alpha dog; always posturing around other dogs, letting everyone know that he was boss. He was smart as a puppy and easy to train, though he didn't always steer clear of trouble.
When he was just 7 months old, he chased down and killed a sheep. I think he was just testing himself, rather than following an instinct to kill. He was a pretty gentle giant, a 100+ lb. teddy bear.
He hated the hot sun, but tolerated it, always happy. He loved the Winter and would perk up so much as the temperature started to cool each Fall. I used to have a sled that he would pull me in. One regret I have is that I never got to take him with me to Alaska, land of his own heritage. Perhaps now your spirit is in Alaska Jakey.
From the time he was with me, he liked to "give me five." This was his way of telling you that he considered you his friend. Another habit of his was to come up to you and bury his head between your legs while you petted and massaged him. He was kind and gentle, in a way that only he had. Such a good dog. Such an even better friend.
Jake was a dog with a few lives, if not nine. Several years ago, while I was on a 4 wheeler ride, Jake running out in front of me, we went up by an old gravel pit, where the landowner had been burning trees and trash. The flames were out, and it was the middle of the day which is, perhaps, why Jake walked right out in the hot ash. It started to burn his poor paws so he laid down on his side, cooking his hair. I jumped off the 4 wheeler and ran into the ash to grab him and pulled him to safety. He was fine, but the pads on his feet were burned. A couple of weeks of bandages and living inside my house and he was better.
During the past few years, as old age began to show its face, he began to be less active which, in turn, made him gain weight. I never considered him a fat dog. He still looked somewhat athletic, but the extra weight began to wear at his joints. He was getting pretty arthritic. I was feeding him glucosamine, MSM, and fish oil with his food, which seemed to slow the arthritis substantially, though not entirely. He was showing signs of being sore and that he was losing some range of motion in his hips. Still, he remained a happy dog, making the best out of his days.
A month ago, he blew out a ligament in his right rear knee. We decided not to do surgery, fearing that the recovery would prove too difficult, and knowing that this sort of injury can heal on its own. We put him on a prescription anti-inflammatory which seemed to help immensely with pain. Then, maybe 10 days ago, he broke a toenail off from the same leg, which led to a severe infection. He was put on an anti-biotic and sent home with bandages, which he pulled off that night. (He couldn't help himself from wanting to lick that very sore paw.) I re-bandaged it only to have him remove that one too. I did his bandages again and put a "buster collar" on him so he couldn't get to the bandages which seemed to help some, though he was determined to get at it again. When I took him in for a check up 2 days later I was faced with the harshest reality; My bandage was too tight and had begun to cut circulation off to his foot. This is hard for me to deal with; a painful regret I hope won't eat at me for the rest of my life. The previous infection had begun to do some bad things to his foot. Wounds were opening up in a few places where the infection could drain out. But now he also had skin starting to die. The prognosis after a couple of days of living at the vet clinic was that it was likely he would lose one or maybe two toes. My heart sank. A big dog, with arthritis, blown knee ligaments, and missing toes--all from the same leg--would have a very drawn out, horrible time recovering. He would likely be recovering for the rest of his natural life. To top all of this off, they found a suspicious mass at the hip of that same leg. There were no easy fixes, no miracles offered. The vet was very good at her job, and just as good at informing me of everything. She spent a good 30 minutes on the phone with me, explaining everything, after hours. Her advice to me--having a 12 year old dog herself--was that full amputation was the 2nd best option. At the clinic last night, full of sorrow and confusion, I listened to her talk about Jake's possible future. The last thing I'd ever want to do is to put my best friend through his final days as a dog which could only lie there and dream of running. As he has had trouble getting up from a lying position for the past couple of years, and progressively more so that last 6 months, I knew that amputation would only be for me not having to say good bye to him. Maybe if he didn't have arthritis in his "good" back leg it would have changed something. The young DVM welled up with tears, telling me about how hard it is to even think of her 12 year old dog getting closer to life's end, answered my plea for advice with, "If he were mine, I would euthanize him." I had been painstakingly thinking about that possibility for days, hoping for some miracle which never came. I can't even type about it now, let alone tell someone about it in person, without sobbing. After my wife and I discussed things, we both felt the best decision for our happy, elderly friend, was to let him go.
And so, hoping his happy spirit has found it's eternal resting/playing place, I write this to tell you how much I loved my friend, and how intensely I miss him. And also, to maybe finish telling Jake how much his friendship has meant to me; how much his loyalty through the ugliest times in my life got me to the better place I now find myself. I love you Jakey. I'll never stop missing you.
Last night, after he passed, I drove him up to some family property, where I placed his body, now painless and carefree, next to his old mate, Kita. I will visit the two of them from time to time. I will not forget them for one day. And I believe I'll see them one day when I pass on from this world.

I feel too much...

2010-03-10T17:04:00.003-07:00

This could turn out to be the worst day of my life. Can a person really make a decision like this? The right decision?

Will I still like myself at 8:00 tonight? Will I like myself at 8:00 tomorrow morning? Will you?

Then, what is it? How much pain is to be endured? How can I think for you? I can't even see straight. Can't move to get out of bed. The only feeling with any clarity is that I want to be numb.

How do I know if your life is full? Isn't that between you and your Maker? How do I know when enough is enough for you? Is this the end you wanted?

Getting ancient; Becoming lame; The cancer; Death at the door. These are the worst tricks that will ever be played on us.

Earth friendliness...

2009-12-02T22:54:00.003-07:00

http://www.sltrib.com/opinion/ci_13910908

I found this letter in the Salt Lake Tribune, and found it refreshingly wise. Indeed, we must be better stewards of the earth. We know that. But are we selfLESS enough to actually do it?

Saturday's portrait session

2009-11-30T23:38:00.008-07:00

Latest Portrait Session

2009-11-29T23:20:00.008-07:00

This is my cute niece, Whitley. She's got the best blue eyes, which totally pop in the right light. Hope you enjoy these. Let me know what you think.

Montana wolves update

2009-11-27T18:07:00.001-07:00

http://www.idahostatesman.com/outdoors/story/988051.html
Update on Montana's wolves. This year's hunt is over....mostly.

Very useful information...

2009-11-26T00:46:00.002-07:00

http://billingsgazette.com/news/opinion/mailbag/article_498cb24a-d8a1-11de-ae4c-001cc4c03286.html

I've used this website (opensecrets) several times and it is quite informative. It can be very telling as to why certain legislators vote the way they do. It's worth a look.

Interesting news from today...(Abortion debate)

2009-11-24T23:18:00.002-07:00

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/25/opinion/25levine.html

I don't know how strong this argument really is. But I'd say anything which aims at reducing the numbers of "unwanted pregnancies," is a step in the right direction.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/25/opinion/25levine.html

ksl.com - Utah GOP opposes citizens ethics initiative

2009-11-23T21:23:00.001-07:00

ksl.com - Utah GOP opposes citizens ethics initiative

I'm going to try and start a new trend for myself; posting the most interesting news article I find each day. I read a lot of news: National news like CNN or international like the UK News, papers from Fairbanks, Anchorage, and Juneau Alaska, one paper from MT, one from ID, and a few from Utah, including KSL. Even the NY Times every once in a while. Sometimes I may post more than one. Anyway, I hope to post the ones that maybe you missed.

The above link will take you to an article about the Utah GOP. I don't think ANY of our ELECTED leaders ought to be against a check and balance by the people who elected them. And if they are opposed, it probably means they're doing things they hope never come to light.

Arts and crafts for sale!

2009-11-21T12:35:00.007-07:00

This one is knotty white pine w/mahogany stain. (Remember, I can stain them to your liking. Any color.)
This is a shadow box. They can be spruced up to fanciness if you'd like. This one is fairly plain. $16.00
This picture frame is made from knotty alder, to which I applied a mahogany stain. Alder will stain almost any shade you'd like, from it's natural light color to almost black. I have lots of it. On this one, I chose to use the molded side for nice framing lines, but I can use plain, flat wood, just the same. I also used a Roman-ogee router bit to trim a nice edge around it. $21.00.
This is a good example of a rustic barn wood picture frame. It is 8X10 in size. I added the rope to this one for my grandpa, the cowboy, but I thought it looked very nice without the rope. $25.00.
A nice frame from barn wood. A lot like the previous one from barn wood, just smaller-dimensions of the wood. It's also an 8X10. $20.00.

Not yer ma's kiddie candids...

2009-11-08T22:34:00.009-07:00

I edited these photos a little further. I think they look better. What do you think?

Recent photo shoot

2009-10-28T23:32:00.004-06:00

I did a photo shoot the other night. It was not the best, since I was sort of hurried by my work schedule. But I managed to get a couple of decent shots. One of Brynn's co-workers wanted portraits of her kids, which I was excited to do. But her daughter, a 4 year old I think, was just hysterically miserable. She was probably cold and tired, too much so for me to convince her to pose and smile. After an hour of trying, I threw in the towel. Hopefully her mom will reschedule and I'll try again.

Wonderful 3-Day Weekend

2009-10-18T21:55:00.003-06:00

So I've had a pretty great weekend. I've been planning to hike Mt. Nebo nearly all year. And this week was my window of opportunity. I took Friday off from work, since Saturday was going to be the opening day of the Utah deer hunt. (I try to avoid being a target, unintended or otherwise.) I didn't really research the hike, other than hiking a bit of the trail from Bear Canyon back in June. After than, I decided to take an easier/flatter route, especially since there is now snow up near the summit. Not realizing the existence of a couple of other choices, I decided to hike it from the Monument Trailhead, right off of the Nebo Loop Byway. I had prepared myself for the worst; backpack full of boots, extra socks, energy bars, gatorade, thermal underwear, jacket, gloves, snowshoes and, most important, the camera and extra lenses.

I headed down the trail, just before 9AM. It was beautiful. I never did put on my jacket or gloves. And I hiked in my trail runners all day. After hiking south between 6 and 7 miles, I began to get frustrated, wondering if this trail was ever going to ascend to the summit. To this point, it had just skirted along the bench, up then down, then back up again. But mostly just taking me south. I finally decided to get off the trail and just start climbing a buttress, which looked like it may get me up near the cliffs. After about 20 minutes or so, I realized that this wasn't going to get me to the top, at least not without a significant chance of falling or worse. Then, I realized I had access to a modern-day convenience--my cellphone. You get cell coverage most of the way. I began calling EVERYONE I could think of who may have hiked Nebo before. Out of the 7 or 8 people I called, about half of them had hiked Nebo. However, NONE of them had hiked it via the trail I had taken because, "it's the longest, most difficult route to the top." Oh, nice one, Wade. It was about 1:00PM by now and I figured I had at least another 2 miles to go south before the trail would climb to the summit. But that meant it was highly unlikely I wouldn't have time to summit and then make it back out by dark. So, feeling a little defeated, I sat down, had some lunch, and took a few pictures. (This place is amazing for photographs. I highly recommend it if you're into that sort of thing.) Anyway, after my little break, I headed back north, toward the trail head and my van. I had hoped to find some wildlife to capture with my camera. Sadly, I didn't see much; Just a yellow-bellied marmot, a couple of sage grouse, and 2 deer, none of which were worth digging my camera out. It was a tough hike out. My left knee had begun to feel the stress of the 30 lbs of gear on my back. And I was drained of energy, not having eaten anything but energy bars that day. One bad thing about that trail is at the end of the day, when you're completely zapped of energy and strength, you'll have to climb upward for about the last mile to the trail head. I thought I could make it OK, but I actually had to sit down and eat 2 more energy bars and another gatorade during the last 1/2 mile.
At the end of the day, this was an amazing hike; A beautiful adventure, and something I hope to do again and again.
I had actually begun to catch a cold Thursday night, and it had fully set in by Friday morning. But I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to take that hike. And by Friday night, I felt sort of terrible. I didn't sleep very well. So when Saturday morning came, I got up early and drove up to the top of Payson Canyon to try and capture sunrise on Nebo Peak. As you can see from the photo, I missed it by about 20 minutes. Oh well; Still a decent photo. On my way back down, I ran into 3 flocks of wild turkeys, the 3rd of which were outside a restroom at the picnic area. Pretty awesome. Sort of made me think of Thanksgiving. I don't know why.

A Mormon vs. The Mormons

2009-10-12T23:26:00.003-06:00

http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13546968

I'm not a huge fan of Harry Reid, though I respect some of his political stances, this being one of them. I hope his criticism of the LDS stance on CA Prop. 8 was not taken in offense, but well-received.

The wolf saga continues...

2009-10-12T23:15:00.001-06:00

http://www.idahostatesman.com/531/story/933932.html

One of life's highlights

2009-10-07T23:44:00.001-06:00

I mean, seriously, after having been on Sesame Street, is there really ANYTHING else for which Mrs. Obama can hope in this life?

Yellowstone Grizzly bear status update

2009-09-22T18:46:00.002-06:00

http://www.idahostatesman.com/localnews/story/907951.html

It's all about whether or not we care about them; whether or not we value "beauty." I'm glad someone is advocating responsibility on the part of humans, to take care, and not just to carry a gun "just in case."

Latest portrait session.....

2009-09-19T14:32:00.007-06:00

Here are a few photos from Thursday night's family portrait session:

Team Unbreakable Fights in Spanish Fork

2009-09-12T10:44:00.004-06:00

Hey Everyone. This upcoming event is going to be great. More important, it's for a good cause. A couple of months ago, Coach Aaron Garcia lost his 3 year old son, Maximus, to a tragic drowning accident. It was a terrible blow to the Garcia Family and to the team, as Maximus is sorely missed. This event is for charity; All proceeds from the fights will go to help pay for the funeral costs, as well as hospital and emergency service costs. So please come out and support a great cause. All ages are welcome.

I'm pretty sure that Damian "The Hunter" Nielson will be fighting a tough opponent, and not just a yellow smiley face.
The Main Event of the evening is going to be a clash of the titans. Drew "Big D" Daniels, from Salem, UT will be fighting a much more experienced Hank "Lord Vice" Weiss. Both of these guys are tough. They're the type of guys you just can't hurt, so it will be a great match up.

It's all taking place Saturday September 19th, from 7:00PM to 9:00 PM at 2000 N 300 W Spanish Fork, UT.

Tickets are available through Coach Aaron Garcia @ 801-691-4035, or at Sequoia Motorsports in Salem, and The Deerhunter Pub in Spanish Fork.

President Obama's speech to the future of our coutntry; our kids.

2009-09-07T14:27:00.001-06:00

http://tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/09/obamas-remarks-for-school-address-as-prepared-for-delivery.php/

Recent portrait session..

2009-09-07T13:35:00.009-06:00

J-walking in downtown Payson.
I didn't think I'd love this shot like I do. But then I thought, what parent doesn't want pictures of their kids at their happiest? And she was just a ham for the camera.
Their older son was the only one who didn't seem to love the camera, or maybe the photographer. I wish I had all of his curly hair.
Had to get their little boy doing what boys do best, playing in the dirt.
Like mom, like daughter. (Yes, I've used this location before.)
This is a great looking family. Made my job easy.

Thanks you guys for letting me do this. It was fun and I can always use the practice.

We DO have an impact.

2009-09-03T18:48:00.002-06:00

http://www.adn.com/news/environment/warming/story/921418.html

Whether you believe global warming is human affected or not, may I just say this: There is NOTHING wrong with doing a better job of taking care of Mother Earth.

Random Acts of Kindness.

2009-08-17T22:39:00.003-06:00

I thought this was the best idea. People need love. They need to love and to be loved. And what better way to accomplish this than through random, but sincere, hugs...for free? I really liked this video.

Just a quick update...nothing amazing

2009-07-19T19:11:00.003-06:00

Well, we spent the day at Mona Reservoir with our friends the Broadbents, as well as some of their extended family. And we had an amazing time.
This was my first time wake boarding. Was surprised I got up. I have to give all the credit to my friend Jami, who jumped out of the boat, swam back to me and the wakeboard to help me figure it all out. So much fun.
I recently did this project for my brother-in-law. I'm calling it a "man-cave." It's built into a corner of his larger than normal 2-car garage. I built the entertainment system onto the wall. He had some cool wood I used for the wainscoting and crown molding. And I had some left over alder for the nosing on the shelves.
Was messing around today after Brynn put this cute fisherman hat on Jericho. I really liked this look and decided it looked best in black and white.
So blessed to have such a happy little boy. He is the light in our lives.

So, there you go. These are a few of the things I've been doing lately. Peace out.

I still like you

2009-07-12T23:28:00.002-06:00

Dear Blogger,
I'm sorry I haven't posted for so long. At the moment, I really don't have anything in particular to say. I just wanted to say that I still like you. I just need a little time. Please be patient with me. I'm going through a lot right now; life has been pretty emotional and stressful. But I know we can make it through this hard time, and you and I will be as close as we were in the days of the wolf blogs. Seriously. I have a few photos I'd like to spruce you up with. But it might take me another couple of days. Please don't hate me. I'll try harder.

-wade-

Just current events...

2009-06-14T20:53:00.003-06:00

OK, I don't really have much to rant about. I wish I did, as I LOVE ranting. But most of you are already aware of my opinions about things; I still love wolves, I still love mtn. biking, I still love Alaska, and I still hate mean people.

Jericho is still growing everyday. He's so big, somewhere around 20lbs. He's crawling all over the place; totally have to keep an eye on him. There have been a couple of minor accidents--both on my watch. The first one happened about a month ago, while getting ready to bathe him. I had put him down on my bed while I shaved my face. I kept peeking around the corner, making sure he was OK, knowing that he can roll around pretty well. He was pretty well staying in one place while I shaved and soon I was finished and ready to put him in the tub. I decided though, that I wanted to bring the laptop into the bathroom and play my iTunes while I bathed him. So, I got it, put it down on the vanity, turned around and Jericho already had his legs hanging off of the bed and before I could get to him-----WHAM!!! Right onto his back. Agh...nice going Dad. He cried his head off, though only for about 2o seconds. But I felt sooooooo bad; I wanted to call the police department and turn myself in; I was just sure I'd committed an atrocious crime.
Next one happened about a week ago as I was taking him for a ride in his stroller. I hadn't even left the house yet; was just walking down the sidewalk out front. As I was thinking of where to take the walk, I noticed a big weed in my lawn and decided to pull it out at once. As I bent down to wrap my hands around that ugly green thing, I failed to notice that the stroller was still on the move, heading for the front of the curb edge. (Although a lady in the car across the street witnessed the entire scene.) Again....WHAM!!! The stroller fell onto its side. Luckily I had him good and buckled in; He cried, but mostly out of being startled I think. Again, I should call the cops and tell on myself. (Brynn's probably wanted at this point for harboring a fugitive--ME.)

At any rate, Jericho is healthy, growing, and seems to love life. He's a happy little boy and loves every knew thing that comes his way. I'm glad he seems to be a bit adventurous since, so am I. I've posted pictures of some of the recent Jericho firsts:

*He seems to like licorice
*He likes hiking alright
*He had his first carousel ride at Springville's Art City Days
*He's still a handsome young lad
*He took his first ride on a 4wheeler. (He couldn't have cared less about the 4wheeler ride itself--he was far more interested in all the guages and hoses and stuff on the ATV)

Officially, my first photo gig...

2009-05-12T23:13:00.005-06:00

Just wanted to post a few of the pics I took recently. This family was really fun. And since none of the group shots ended up perfectly (with everyone's eyes open or looking at the camera), the best pics ended up being the spontaneous candids. Anyway, if you like them, great. If not, and you have some advice, I would LOVE it.

In Memory of My Friend, Dylan

2009-05-10T17:21:00.004-06:00

Yesterday, May 9, 2009, my friend, Dylan, was laid to rest. He passed away on Wednesday and it's been a very emotional week for me. I worked with Dylan and his dad, Travis for 2 years or so at RJ Lewis, Inc. We're all finish carpenters, and Dylan was quickly learning the trade and becoming quite good at it. He was only 17 1/2 years old, but he was a good worker and was really taking pride in his job and in the things he built. His dad asked us if we could build a casket for Dylan. My boss was quick to take on the task. We're a tight crew--all of us are friends--and we'd do anything for each other. We especially loved Dylan. He was the crazy glue which held us together a lot of the time, always making light of things and keeping us laughing.

He was a bit of a hippie, wearing his hair long, keeping a good collection of tie-dyed t-shirts and peace signs around. And he had a lot of hippie friends. You may have seen them around Payson, just hanging out and walking around bare-foot. I never knew how many of these friends he had until his memorial service; It sort of looked like a smaller-scaled Woodstock. Pretty cool, and just how Dylan would've liked it. His graveside service wasn't the traditional religious service, the kind I've been to many times. Rather, it was a beautiful celebration and tribute to him, and who he was. My boss, Rich Lewis, conducted the service, and gave a well-worded speech. Dylan's aunt, Angela, then talked about Dylan; all of his amazing qualities, especially that of knowing what it is to be a good person. I thought it was a nice touch that Angela, amongst other family members, dressed in traditional hippie/flower child attire. Dylan would have loved seeing her. And perhaps he did. His Uncle Joel played a song on his guitar, and sang "Wish You Were Here," by Pink Floyd, a favorite of Dylan's. His Grandma Judy then talked about Dylan and all of the progress he'd made in the time he's been living at her house. The whole family is lucky to have Judy. She's always been such a strong and good person.

At the end of the service, Travis took the mic and thanked everyone for coming. He then talked about the casket that he had helped make for his son, a very emotionally therapeutic project, indeed. It was a beautiful casket, one that Dylan would have loved. But Dylan also loved VW Buses and all things hippie. He was a free spirit, and had a very creative mind. So Travis told everyone to write something on the casket, and he had an assortment of colored Sharpies with which to do it. I thought that maybe a few kids would write on it, or that his closest hippie friends would. But to my surprise and joy, nearly everyone there wrote something, some message, or just drew a flower, a sun, or a peace sign. It looked amazing when it was done. No one could agree more, that this service couldn't have been any more perfect, if Dylan had written the script to it himself.

To my friend Dylan: I love you Man. You were one of the good ones. You had reached points in your life that were ahead of your time; points I can only hope to reach at some point. I will miss you Friend. Thank you for sharing yourself with all of us before you had to go. We'll see you on the flip-flop.

We began making his ca

My baby boy is 6 months old!!!

2009-05-04T21:49:00.003-06:00

The past 6 months have truly been a highlight, if not THE highlight, of my life. Jericho has been such an amazing addition to mine and Brynn's life together. I have never before experienced happiness and love as I now understand them. I experience such intense emotion whenever I kiss my son goodnight. (Very unfortunately, I have a cold sore right now, which sort of hampers this.) He's becoming a little boy now. Almost seems like he's done being a baby. Somewhere, he's learned this tough guy voice and he loves to make it, especially when he's standing up. It's so funny.
I always heard about the joys and such of having kids from friends of mine; how you can't wait to get home after work to be with them; how amazing it is to see you and your mate in that child; and how you've never experienced love like this until you have a child. All true.
Physically, Jericho is looking more and more like Brynn, lucky for him. He's definitely got her big, beautiful, blue eyes. I like to think that he smiles like me. (That's about all I can see in him anymore). But he's growing so quickly. I almost wish I could put his growth and development on pause, this is such an amazing time in his little life. I haven't measured him in inches but I think he's right around 20lbs. Definitely going to be bigger than me.
One thing is for sure, and that is that he can melt your heart in an instant--no matter how bad or great your day has been. If I'm down, blue, or stressed, all I need is a big dose of Jericho.
Brynn, being her usually thoughtful self, bought his a cake for his 6 month birthday. I think all he got was a couple of tastes of icing, which he seemed to dig pretty well. But we're just so happy he's ours and I feel so incredibly blessed and fortunate to be a part of his life.
Happy Birthday, Son. Daddy loves you.

The Wolf Issue; Volume IV

2009-05-02T21:42:00.002-06:00

I've thought for years about the reasons man fears the wolf. I think there are numerous reasons, not the least of which is misunderstanding. From the time humans are youngsters, they're taught that wolves are to be feared. There are countless legends about werewolves, a monster which is a man-wolf hybrid. Little Red Riding-Hood had a bad experience with a wolf, dressed as her grandmother. And the Three Little Pigs were afraid that their houses would be blown down by the Big Bad Wolf. I cannot recall a book or nursery rhyme about a good wolf. Many books, pictures, and movies portray wolves as scary, bloody creatures, with huge fangs and an appetite for babies. An interesting research topic is the number of sharks killed shortly after the Jaws movies were released on the big screen. And such was the wolves' fates, nearly to the point of their extinction, until the 70s when attitudes finally began to change.

I think another, more obscure psychological reason for hating or fearing wolves, is that wolves are so similar to men. Man has made the mistake, time and time again in history, of killing that which he has not understood, or those by whom he has felt threatened. And wolves were no exception. How are people and wolves alike? Well, lets start with the obvious; they are social, living in family units, called packs. Humans seem to get joy, happiness, or fulfillment from their families and friends. A wolf's very survival depends on his relationship and bond with the pack. People get all giddy and full of joy when a new baby is born into their family. And the birth of new pups is the most exciting time of the year for a pack of wolves. As I have stated previously, only the alpha male and female reproduce, but the new pups belong to the entire pack. Each member from the alphas to the omegas, has new joys and new responsibilities with the babies. The adult wolves all take part in feeding, baby-sitting, teaching, and playing with the pups. And before the pups are born, there is the job of caring for the pregnant female. At some point, she becomes unable to go out and hunt, but still has to eat. It has been witnessed many times that the other pack members will bring food to the mother in her den. The pack truly works like a family, everyone looking out for everyone. Again, their survival depends on it. (Sound a lot like your family?) By the way, that member to member care and loyalty doesn't stop at the alpha female. It's been witnessed of wolves in captivity when a wolf becomes old, sick, or injured, that other healthy wolves will bring food to that wolf. At any rate, it doesn't take long to see just how alike wolves and humans are. It's unfortunate that this fact has been cause for fear, rather than respect and understanding.

The following is an excerpt from the research of L. David Mech, probably the most well-known wolf biologist in the U.S:

Very few mammals have symbiotic relationships with other creatures. One
of the few exceptions is the *wolf*:

"The *wolf* seems to have few relationships with other animals that
could be termed purely social, though he apparently takes pleasure in
the company of ravens. The *raven*, with a range almost as extensive as
the wolf's, one that even includes the tundra, commonly follows hunting
wolves to feed on the remains of a kill." (Barry Lopez, Of Wolves And
Men, p. 67)

The *raven* is sometimes known as "*wolf*-bird," and some zoologists
speculate that its *relationship* with wolves may be assisted by their
psychological make-up:

"It appears that the *wolf* and the *raven* have reached an adjustment
in their relationships such that each creature is rewarded in some way
by the presence of the other and that each is fully aware of the other's
capabilities. Both species are extremely social, so they must possess
the psychological mechanisms necessary for forming social attachments.
Perhaps in some way individuals of each species have included members of
the other in their social group and have formed bonds with them." (David
Mech, The *Wolf*: The Ecology and Behaviour of an Endangered Species)

The relationship between wolves and ravens is so interesting to me. Sort of a, "you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours" thing.

Well, this was a short entry. Probably a relief to most of you. I think this may be the final entry on this topic, unless I decide to post updates on wolf numbers and other stats, such as numbers of killed wolves or pack and pup numbers from year to year. Unless any of you have specific questions that I haven't yet addressed.

Thanks for your interest in one of my greatest passions.

What more could I ask for?

2009-04-28T22:35:00.003-06:00

After years of unsuccessful attempts to find me a mate, my Uncle Joe finally had the timing right to fix Brynn and me up on a blind date. Actually, I arranged it; he just gave me her phone number and a nudge into doing it. I called her and could tell right away that she had a decent sense of humor and that we could probably have fun on a night out. We soon got together for dinner at the Tepanyaki Restaurant in Provo. We had delicious food and, although she made fun of me a bit over my shaved arms, we had a nice time, with no shortage of good conversation. I cannot say it was love at first sight, but it was a good first date and I wanted a second. Two dates led to three, and then four, and then it all snowballed into a relationship. Yikes! Up to that point I had been afraid of RELATIONSHIPS, having been hurt and burned a time or two. (As my mom puts it, I had been around the block).

Anyhow, it didn't take more than 9 or 10 months to realize that Brynn was the one with whom I wanted to spend my life. And she must have thought I was OK too because she said yes to my marriage proposal. (Well, after she finished laughing, that is).

We were married on April 29, 2006, in her parents' beautiful backyard. A day or two later, we loaded up the car and moved to Anchorage, AK, where we spent 6 months working and playing. I had hoped she'd fall in love with Alaska, as I had, and want to stay permanently. But she had other thoughts and other plans for us. We moved back to Utah, got jobs, and sort of settled in, or, began building our nest, as it were. We got our first house about 1 1/2 years ago in Payson, my hometown. At about the perfect time, Jericho, our first son, was born.

My life is no longer my own. It is now ours. I have a family, something I wasn't sure I'd ever have. (I think my parents worried about it more than I did.) But I am thrilled with my life at this point. I have two people who love and depend on me. And I cannot imagine loving anyone or anything more than I love my wife and my son. I'm reminded of a quote from the story of Christopher McCandless, in "Into the Wild." At the end of his life, when it was nearly too late, he realized, "Happiness is only real when it's shared." (That may be misquoted; Let's call it a paraphrase).

Well, I just want to tell my wife, my lover, the mother of my child, my soul-mate, that I love her. Brynn, you truly are the best thing that's/who's ever happened to me. I am a better person, simply for knowing you. You are a wonderful example of unconditional love and of goodness. Thank you for the past 4 1/2 years. Thank you for our son. You are an amazing mom. Most of all, thank you for loving me.

Happy Anniversary baby!

The Wolf Issue, Part III

2009-04-19T21:20:00.003-06:00

OK, I know this is sort of late. I've been preoccupied with other things and trying to compile my thoughts on this issue so that maybe you'd all get something out of it. I said last time that I'd talk about the positives of having wolves back in the wild. So, along with other things, let's talk about that.

Now, as I've already discussed, hunters are concerned about having wolves back in the wild; about having a predator to compete with. Some of you may have listened to hunters go on and on about how the wolves have or will deplete the elk herds, which wouldn't be right. People talk about how the elk numbers in Yellowstone have dropped significantly since the early 90s, before wolf reintroduction. That is actually true. Elk numbers have dropped by as much as half in certain parts of the park. But this isn't surprising. The elk went more than 60 years without a predator, which made them very comfortable; almost tame. During those 60 + years, the elk numbers actually got out of hand. There were too many elk. There was overgrazing in many areas, which leads to other problems. Elk would eat and trample the plants and grasses which lined stream/river banks, which, in turn led to erosion. Waterways became wider and took new turns. Native plants in those areas nearly went extinct. Where the water ran slow enough, beavers used to build dams and lodges. Once enough erosion occurred and changed the flow patters, beavers eventually became non-existent where before they had thrived. One of the most detrimental things was disease. You see, if the elk numbers become too great, and there's no reason for herds to move or break up into smaller herds, disease becomes rampant, being passed on to the young calves, over and over. For many reasons, it became obvious that something was missing in Yellowstone. The West needed its wolves.

Wolves generally cull the elk populations, by taking out the weak, the sick, or the old. (That's the general pattern--I realize it's not the case 100% of the time.) So, with the wolves in the picture, Yellowstone's elk are healthier. The presence of a supreme predator has caused the elk to change their behavior. No longer do they stay in one place, over populating and over-grazing. The elk now move around. They are much more alert. Native plants are making a comeback along the streams and rivers. Erosion has ceased being the major problem it was. Beavers are back. Fox numbers are up. And the great bio-community is much closer to equilibrium, that balance which is characteristic of a healthy eco-system.

The elk are not gone. They are just more aware of predators, including humans. They don't hang out off the sides of the roads as much. Now the hunters will just have to step their game up and actually hunt, in order to kill. Don't believe me? According to the USFWS, the elk populations of EACH of Idaho, Wyoming, and Montana are a minimum of 14% ABOVE state objectives. So, have wolves decimated elk populations? The simple, irrefutable answer is no.

I realize I've not yet talked much about the social behavior of wolves, especially pack dynamics. That will come in the 4th installment. I'll try to get it up within a week's time.

Here are some websites though, in case you are becoming more and more interested in this topic.

http://fws.gov/mountain-prarie/species/mammals/wolf/

http://westernwolves.org

**The photo above is actually a coyote track, which is half the size of a wolf track, but extremely similar otherwise. It's all I had. And, although wolves and coyotes are closely related, by no means are they the same.

The Wolf Issue, Part II

2009-04-06T21:52:00.003-06:00

So, I've now introduced you to the reintroduction of wolves into Yellowstone. I think I want to talk a bit about wolves, their biology, their behavior, and, especially, their social behavior. I want to give you some bits of information, and let you judge, for yourself, whether or not wolves should have a place on the land.

Aldo Leopold did many things during his lifetime but was more notable known as a naturalist/conservationist. (He wasn't always; Do a bit of research and find out what changed his life and his attitude). But I wanted to throw a couple of his quotes in here, quotes with which I think you might agree.

"We abuse land because we regard it as a commodity belonging to us. When we see land as a community to which we belong, we may begin to use it with love and respect." -Aldo Leopold

"A thing is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, stability, and beauty of the biotic community. It is wrong when it tends otherwise." -Aldo Leopold

Now, here are two questions I'd like you to ask yourself and see if you can answer at this point in your life: 1) Are wolves, as a part of nature, helping preserve the integrity, stability, and beauty of the biotic community (the community of all life in the Northern Rockies Recovery Area)? 2) Would allowing or supporting ranchers and hunters to kill off the wolf population in the biotic community, in which they live, help to preserve the integrity, stability, and beauty?

What do we know about wolves and this recovery program?
*Since 1996, the wolf numbers have gone up every year, except this year, when it went down. (So, we began with 66; we now have about 1600).
*In 2008, livestock predation cases numbered 523 for all of Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming. About 245 wolves were LEGALLY killed in those states. (These are the reported numbers. It's expected that there are more killed illegally, which aren't reported).
*The Federal Government, in conjunction with the original reintroduction agreement, and along with other non-profit organizations, compensates ranchers for livestock lost to wolf predation.

So there are conflicts, between wolves and people who don't like wolves, or who do not want them around. That was pretty much a known going into the program. But there have always been efforts to lessen these conflicts, through lethal and non-lethal means. The point is, while there will always be some conflict, we can deal with it, and we can try and make it as fair as possible to all sides. While I want the rancher to be protected as he makes his living, I want tolerance and patience for the existence of wolves.

OK, I'm getting a little fuzzy with where to go from here. (I have a tendency to get off on tangents, regardless of the subject).

Why do ranchers hate wolves? Because wolves eat their livestock. That's the simple answer to it. The complex answer is that they're afraid that wolves will eat all their livestock, even if they've not had any wolf problems yet. And that would be bad for their business. I realize ranching is hard work. I realize that squeezing a buck out of all that work is really hard. But I also think there can be middle ground. I donate to a charity every year that pays into the compensation fund. That's right Mr. Rancher; I want to protect you too. But you have to take some responsibility. You have to assume some risk; That's just part of owning a business. Also, if you summer your animals up in the mountains or on "Free range," you've definitely got to assume some risk. (That's when most predation occurs). You can do things to protect your herds/flocks. Use guard dogs. This is extremely effective. Ride through your herds as often as possible to portray a human presence. (Wolves will avoid humans at almost all costs). OK, here's one of the most innovative things I've heard, but it was done in Europe, not here. Because wolves are fiercely territorial, and are usually pretty staunch about not crossing another pack's boundaries, a sheep rancher put a few loud speakers around his property and played recordings of a pack of wolves' defensive howls, several times a day. It worked like a charm. Zero wolf run-ins. I realize this isn't going to feasible in every case. But put your cowboy hats together. Surely you can come up with something.

Hunters. Oh the hunters. They should call most of you opportunistic killers of lazy convenience. Why do the hunters hate wolves? (Not all hunters do, I realize.) Because wolves are predators and hunters don't like competing with natural predators for game. Hunters like elk. Wolves like elk. The problem for hunters is that a pack of wolves is the supreme killing machine, and wolves don't have to wait until hunting season, or to see if they "drew a tag." I would dare say, and I'm not very naive on the subject, that MOST hunters do their hunting these days, primarily for a nice trophy to hang on a wall, with which to impress themselves and their peers. The meat is secondary, if used and eaten at all. (How about those trophy hunters going on "Safari" in Africa? Talk about a canned hunt. And they don't get to bring the meat home. What a blood-letting waste.) Wolves kill because they have to. If they don't they die. Face it Mr. Hunter; if a 90lb. wild dog can bring an elk down, it deserves that meal. And driving on the dirt roads in your huge truck or on your ATV, sporting your expensive gear, not the least of which is your high-powered rifle and scope, which you'll use to make that 500 yard shot, IS NOT HUNTING. How do I know? Because I grew up hunting. Anyway, while I can get behind the ranchers a bit, I just cannot conjure up anything sympathy for your plight. Sorry.

I think the hostility toward wolves is rooted in the traditions of hunting and ranching in the West. But I also think a lack of understanding and education is a big factor as well. Most of these anti-wolf people have never seen a wolf in the wild. Many of them cannot tell the difference between wolves and coyotes. Really, I think education about wolves and wolf biology would go a long way in quelling the madness. You many want to pick up another book, or visit some good websites, especially if the last pieces of literature you read were "Little Red Riding Hood," or "The Three Little Pigs."

Hunters will argue that their side should trump mine because of all the money they spend on licenses, permits, tags, and such, some of which ends up in conservation efforts. I think that's great. I too spend money on conservation efforts. I think it's a worthy cause. I'm glad you like to hunt. I just wish more of you did it for meat only. (I think you'd be a little less competitive and angry if you weren't so preoccupied with getting a bigger trophy than your buddies.) I'll add this as well: In Utah, according to the USFWS Survey, for every $1 spent on hunting and fishing, $2 are spent on wildlife watching. So, maybe my side trumps yours? No, remember I believe that we can reach middle ground and have everyone win in some way.

OK. I'll end there. There will be a Part III very soon, which will talk about all of the positives of having wolves back in the Wild West.

***Oh yeah, why did I post a picture of my two dogs? I'll touch more on that next time but, it's because our domesticated pet dogs are the same species as wolves. That's right, if it weren't for wolves, the rancher wouldn't have his heelers, the hunter wouldn't have his hounds, and Paris Hilton wouldn't have her tea cup poodle accessories. OH BROTHER!!!

The wolf issue, through my eyes...

2009-04-03T22:37:00.004-06:00

OK, this may be lengthy, as I have plenty to say about this issue and am horrible, sometimes, at compiling my thoughts in an orderly, coherent fashion. I have been passionate about canis lupus (the gray wolf) for about 10 years. In college, whenever it was allowed, I would write my papers on wolves. I really don't know where my interest originated, but I have become more and more involved in this issue; especially that of wolf reintroduction in Yellowstone National Park, and in the Northern Rockies. Anyhow, if you do much looking around, you'll find out that this is a pretty hot-button, contentious issue in the West. The following entry is what I think about the whole thing.

The last known wolf in the western U.S. was shot and killed in about 1930. Where wolves once roamed free, they were now gone. This was not coincidence. It was not simply the wolves' fate. It was done, according to orders by the U.S. government. You see, by this time, there were many sheep and cattle ranches, spread across the land. And, as often, or rare, as it happened, the fact was that wolves were killing sheep and cattle. Why? Well, I have a few ideas. Let's back up a bit. Before the West was settled by these ranchers, wolves had food in plentiful supply: deer, elk, moose, and bison. (Also a lot of mice and squirrels during the summers). Well, bison in particular would feed a wolf pack very well. But bison were nearly killed to extinction as well, in part to starve out the American Indian, and, to make room on the praries for great herds of cattle. Rid the wolves of bison herds and the wolves move onto the next best thing: stupid cows. I like to bring this up to wolf hating ranchers because, it's my opinion that the ranchers sort of perpetuated the problem. To solve the problem back then, the powerful and wealthy ranchers coaxed the government to get rid of the big, bad wolves. And it was done by any means necessary back then; trapping, shooting, poisoning, drowning (pups), etc...

Well, jump ahead to the 70s. People, across the country, began to think differently about wildlife, even predators, which included wolves. Thank God for the hippies. In 1973 the Endangered Species Act was passed. The wolves were soon on it, and the workings of bringing these incredible animals back had begun. It took 20 years or so to make enough progress with changing public opinion, researching environmental impact, and convincing the government that Yellowstone needed wolves in its eco-system. (Wolves actually roamed the entire country at one time, especially the mountainous land from Alaska and Canada, down to Mexico.) In 1996, the first wolves were brought from Canada, mainly British Columbia, to Yellowstone National Park. The reintroduction of wolves into their once native territory was happening.

Now for some wolf biology. Wolves have something in them, much like a homing device. Take them to Yellowstone and drop them off, they'll find their way back to Canada in a matter of days. They travel, even within their own territories, an average of 25 miles daily. They do this with ease, being natural-born athletes, with very strong lungs, and long legs. Because of these things, when the wolves were transported to Yellowstone, they were placed with their families, in acre-sized holding pens, and kept there for 10 weeks. There were 3 pens total, placed in 3 different areas of the park. They were called acclimation pens. And they were successful; After 10 weeks, the wolves had forgotten about Canada and now claimed these areas as home. A total of 66 wolves were brought into the park. Just over 12 years later, there are an estimated 1500-1600 wolves within the Northern Rockies Recovery area, which includes parts of Montana, Idaho, Wyoming, and a small chunk of Northern Utah. The recovery has been successful thus far.

When the government agreed to this project, the plan was to get a certain number of packs established, and then to turn the management over to the affected states. A little over a year ago, the Bush Administration delisted wolves from the Federal Endangered Species list. Quickly, conservation groups sued the feds to relist wolves, arguing that all of the objectives of the project had not been met. A judge ruled and wolves were relisted. Just before Bush left office, he delisted wolves again, a decision which was upheld about a week ago by our current Secretary of the Interior. However, the fight will go on and, I'm sure, the wolves will be re-relisted soon. The biggest problem with taking federal protections away now is that one really important thing hasn't happened enough. Because the packs have moved around, and their boundaries are now separated by highways, housing developments, urban sprawl, etc...the gene pools are not mixing. But, I'm not sure how that will ever happen now. It's not like those developments and highways are going away. In reality, there will be those who will never want wolves delisted. Biologists, on the other hand, want the states to manage the wolves. This would be more likely if Wyoming were to change their position and their managment plan, which, currently, is to list wolves as vermin, where they can be shot on site at any time, for any reason, in 90% of the state. Not going to happen Wyoming. Well, that's how the reintroduction program has gone thus far.

I think I'm going to present this stuff in a few parts. It's just getting to long and no one likes to read long post. So, I'll do it in a few shorter entries. But if you read this, and you have any comments or questions, please leave them and it will spark a better discussion and more thoughts in my mind for the coming entries.

P.S. That photo is from a book I own, called "The Wolves of Yellowstone." That is "Male #10,"--one of the original 66. His genes are everywhere in the Northern Rockies recovery area now. Incidentally, none of the 66 are still alive.

Leftovers...

2009-03-29T23:17:00.003-06:00

I've cleaned out my memory cards. The following are the leftovers. Just random things from photography class. Enjoy. Or don't. I really don't care.

1) The river on its way out to Utah Lake.

2) Professor Jami.

3) Marie. Life of the party.

4) Baby on a box.

5) Baby in a basket.

P.S. These were all taken with that little Casio point and shoot that I brought to class all those times. Probably would have done a better job with my new camera. Oh well.

Spring Storm '09. A treat for the dogs.

2009-03-29T17:38:00.004-06:00

Just wanted to post these photos. I took them today after the sky threw down about 4 inches of snow. It always puts a little spring in my dogs' steps. And, since I haven't taken any pictures of Jake and Puka for awhile, I thought today was the perfect opportunity.

Puka is our 4 year old Siberian Husky/wolf female. While I would never promote wolf/dog breeding, we wanted to give Puka a better home than she previously had. And we love her. She's so pretty. We especially love her icy blue eyes, which are a little tough to capture, given her wiggly, high-strung temperment.

Jake is our 10 year old Alaskan Malamute. I've had him since he was a pup and we have been best friends ever since. He's a terrific pet.

It took these two over a year to accept each other, but they have and are quite the pair. Incidentally, they were quick to accept our son, Jericho, as the newest pack member. I'd love to do an entire family portrait. But that's really going to take some work and more patience than I have to spare right now.

Jami's photography workshop '09...

2009-03-29T02:21:00.004-06:00

I've forever been interested in photography and, recently, I signed up for and attended a photography workshop. It was given by a good friend of ours, Jami Broadbent. She's the pretty girl holding the flower. (She was helping me learn to use the focus points on my camera.) I've known Jami for over 10 years, having met her through one of my longtime friends, Mr. Jarin Broadbent, Emeritus Champion Elvis impersonator and 1st chair percussionist, 8th grade band. He's the classy guy with the polka-dot phone in hand. Anyway, these are two of the best people I know, and it's been fun having Jami teach me the art of portrait photography. (Mind you, she is one of the best photographers around, seriously.)

Her course was six weeks long and I learned a lot. The class was interesting from the beginning. When I arrived for the first class, I found myself to be the only guy. The other 10 students were all girls. I could also be identified in class as the only one using a point and shoot camera, rather than the fancier, more professional SLRs. Everyone was nice to me about it, and eventually, I got my own SLR. Yeah!!! Best present to myself, ever! (Thank you for letting me get it Honey). Also, eventually, another guy began showing up for class. The testosterone and estrogen see-sawed more toward a balance.

Jami taught us everything we need to know. (Well, to get us started anyway. I keep telling her she needs to do "Jami's Photography Workshop, Volume II.") I now know about apertures, f-stops, ISO, and histograms. I know what someone means when they talk about leading lines, the rule of thirds, and proper subject-framing. I feel so smart. But I also know that there is a ton that I still don't know. And I'm still thousands of dollars away from being properly and sufficiently equipped to do wildlife photography as I'd like. Still, I'm wiser than I was a couple of months ago.

Saturday was our final class. For it, we hung out around the quaint downtown of Payson, UT. We had a model there, a daughter of one of my classmates. (I'm so bad; I've forgotten her name. I want to say Mallory, but I'm unsure). At any rate, she was a great model; made it easy to take decent pictures. I still don't have all the settings just right, but I've posted 3 of, what I feel are, my best pictures.

Hope you all like them. And if you don't, I'll gladly accept your constructive criticism.

Lions and Tigers and...well....mostly bears...OH MY!!!

2009-03-07T22:09:00.004-07:00

Last year at this same time, my boss told me about the possibility of going with him and this biologist friend of his down to track bears in Southeastern Utah. But when it came down to it, there wasn't room for me after he decided to take all of his boy scouts instead. I was bummed to say the least. But this year, he had the same chance to go again and made sure that there was a place for me. No scouts this time. Yeah!!!
So today I woke up at about 5AM so that I could get myself ready to meet Rich (my boss) at the mouth of Spanish Fork Canyon by around 6. My wife worked last night and, since she wouldn't be off until 6AM, she was kind enough to let me drop Jericho off at the ER for the remainder of her shift. So nice to have such a wonderful wife and so glad that dropping Jericho off at the ER is cool with everyone else.
Anyway, I met my boss and we drove about 3 1/2 hours to an area called the Book Cliffs. I sort of had the idea that it was just me and Rich going with Doc Black (the head biologist). When we arrived at the meeting point, there were about 100 other people. No; literally about a hundred other people. I was a little disappointed at first, hoping that I was in for a more intimate encounter with nature and wildlife, but after this experience I am grinning ear to ear.
The bear we tracked--by radio collar--was a 24 year old sow. (Black bears have a life expectancy of around 25 years--and this one is still having babies). She has been tracked for many years and was once thought to be a bum mom, never successfully rearing her cubs past the first year. Instead, most of her cubs starved. Anyway, in her sunset years, she has had 2 sets of triplets and had just a single female cub this year. I was sort of hoping for a nice hike but this bear was found only 1/4 mile from the road. As you can imagine, having a 100 people there, of all ages, was a recipe for chaos. Doc Black and his students kept stressing the importance of being quiet and not doing anything that might frighten or alarm the sow or the cub. But a crowd will be a crowd, and it was a bit like the lines for the rides at DisneyLand. We were kept back at the road until the grad students had successfully tranquilized the sow. Then we were told, "OK, now talk in your church voices and we're just going to SLOWLY meander on over to the den; no need to run or get into a hurry." I was immediately taken back to my days as a tour bus driver in Alaska when I'd tell people to, "Be quiet." "Don't run." "Don't feed/touch the animals." This crowd of 100 eager bear lookers moved like an army of hungry ants on their way to devour the day's unlucky victim. I pretty much saw it coming.
Well, when I finally got my turn at the den, I was thrilled to sit down by that magnificent animal. How amazing to think that this stealthy bear has made it 24 years in this area known for some of the most prize hunting in Utah. And here she was, raising another cub, one that will, hopefully, go on to raise her own for years to come. The photo opportunity at this point was over quickly. Once everyone had taken their turns, most everyone took off back to the road and their vehicles. Rich and I stayed behind, watching Doc Black as some BYU students interviewed him on camera. The biology students had pulled the sow back into her den by now, and had placed her cub with her again. And then, to my astonishment, they told us we could crawl back into the den and take pictures in there, since the sedation hadn't yet worn off. "Are you serious?!?!, I asked." And they said it was OK. So we crawled in their on our stomachs, with our cameras and got within about 3 feet of her head to snap some amazing shots. (Funny thing, apparently my new camera's setting was on too large a file size so the pics I've posted were all that will fit here). I'll post everything on facebook.
Anyway, this was such an amazing experience. Those of you who know me well enough, know that I LOVE wildlife, especially seeing it alive. (Not so big on killing things so I can look at the carcass on my walls). I really hope this will turn into something I can do a few more times in the future.

Last fight...

2009-02-17T18:03:00.003-07:00

So I decided to blog about my last fight, in case anyone was wondering what the experience is like. This may be a long entry, as there's a million things involved in fighting and another million things that go through my head before, during and after.

Training: One of the reasons I've been thinking about winding down my fighting career is the amount of time and dedication it takes to prepare for a fight, especially at my age. I've spent countless hours at the gym, running, sprinting, stretching, lifting weights, sparring and grappling. And I don't believe it's possible to train too much. But with a full-time job, side jobs, honey-do's, a wife, and a 3 month old son, time is hard to come by. I won't go into every minute of my training, but I'll give you an idea of the average night at the gym:
6:00PM.....Get on the treadmill for 40 minutes. These 40 minutes or so will consist of anything from a steady pace of 7mph for an extended period to wind sprints, switching the speeds back and forth from 6mph to 10, or from 6mph to 12. The point is to get your heart, lungs and muscles used to working steadily, and ready and able to exert force and power at any given time.
6:45PM.....Stretching. This can take up to 15 minutes. I've sustained so many injuries from a lack of flexibility and a lack of sufficiently stretched or warmed up muscles. And you have to stretch everything from head to toe, especially focusing on your neck, your shoulders, your hips, knees and ankles. It pays off, allowing you to train with few to no serious injuries and to kick higher and strike and move more quickly.
7:00PM.....Stand-up. This time is spent in the ring/cage, working on different tools of striking; punches, elbows, kicks and knees. There is an infinite number of striking combinations to work on; depending on your individual style. We have a round timer at the gym and I always set it for 3 minute rounds and 30 second breaks. I have had several sparring partners, ranging from beginners to advanced. We don't try to kill each other; we're training--not actually fighting. We always wear mouth guards to protect our teeth and hopefully our jaws, and we wear 16oz. boxing gloves, rather than the little 4oz. gloves worn in a real fight. Stand-up training would be for 3 to 5 rounds.
7:30PM....Grappling. This mainly is about controlling someone while on the ground. But as you know, MMA fights are about stopping, or submitting your opponent. So jiu-jitsu is a huge part of our training. We "roll" on the mats, with the round timer, for 3 minute rounds and 30 second breaks again. And I'd usually go for 3 rounds of ground training a night. When submitting an opponent, we use different holds that put extreme pressure on the joints, or on the respiratory and circulatory systems. Things like arm bars and kimuras will break bones or dislocate bones at the joints, and submissions like rear-naked chokes and triangles cut off the carotid arteries, stopping blood flow to the brain. This is where the phrase "Tap, snap, or nap" comes from.
8:00PM.....Game planning. This time is spent honing in on my strengths and trying to put the best game plan together. For this last fight, I had gotten comfortable standing up and trading strikes and felt like that was going to be my strength. So a lot of time was put into stand-up and less emphasis was put on my ground game. After talking about my game plan, and letting it evolve each night, I'd either go run a bit more or lift weights. And that has been my training.

The fight: I had found out about my opponent several days before the fight. To my advantage, I was able to look up some video of his previous 2 fights, in order to determine his fighting style. From both videos, I knew he was a wrestler. I could see he was a tough guy, with a build about like mine. I could see that he could throw a punch, but he didn't seem to be very experienced with striking in general. So of course, I figured I had a slight advantage in a stand-up fight, and perhaps a slight disadvantage on the ground. The plan was to catch him with my left hook and follow it with a big right. We were going for the knockout and avoiding being taken down.

The night before my fight, I couldn't sleep. One thing I've never been able to shake in this sport, is the pre-fight jitters. They were worse this time than for my previous fights. Not only did I have a hard time getting any sleep, my stomach was queezy and I had no appetite. The day of the fight came and I had to force myself to eat anything. I tried doing things that would get my mind right like stretching and listening to some of my favorite music on my iPod. I rode over to the fight with my 2 corners and they sort of eased my mind, just talking about everyday stuff and not so much about the fight. My mind was everywhere though, especially on my sick son, who has RSV. When we got to the club, we walked inside and found it to be about 40 degrees. Seriously, I was surprised I couldn't see my breath. It was cold, which made it tougher to warm up. I hadn't met my opponent yet and was pretty anxious to see him and size him up. (Such a guy thing--we do that outside the cage sometimes too.) He finally got there and to my joy, he was clearly a bit shorter than I am and didn't look any bigger than me strength wise. Still, he was somehow intimidating. While I was warming up, his corners kept coming my way and watching me and then going back and telling him what they were seeing. This went on forever. I felt like it was pretty cheap, even though they really weren't doing anything against the written rules. That was all I needed right then; more stuff playing with my mind. I was starting to think about all my little injuries and how I hadn't eaten enough and wondering if my cardio was up to where it needed to be. By time it was fight time, I was making myself sick inside. Not good.

It's on! The announcer cues me to head out to the cage. I had a lot of friends and family there who were cheering loudly. (When you're beating the crap out of someone, fans really help egg you on to a win. When you're worried and not confident, it makes it worse). Anyway, I did my best to shake the nerves before I actually stepped into the cage. Once you're in there, things happen quickly. The ref checks you both out, making sure you're wearing your gloves properly, that you have a cup on, and that your mouth guard is in. Suddenly it's, "Red Corner are you ready?!?! Black corner, are you ready?!?!.......FIGHT!!!"

What happened: We came out and touched gloves. (A gesture that you each want to have a good, clean fight). Our hands were up, guarding our faces and the fight was on. I think I got off first. He was going to wait to see what my striking looked like I think. I threw out 3 or 4 fake jabs and then a left jab-left hook. He moved and I missed. I could already tell he wasn't going to go easy. I decided to set up some leg kicks. (I had talked about this with my corners beforehand and how I needed to fake some jabs before throwing the leg kicks so he'd be distracted and wouldn't catch my leg for a take down). I threw the kick but only caught him with my foot. (An appropriate kick is done using your shin, just above the ankle). I threw another kick with the same result. I thought, "Man, this guy has been training and working on his stand-up. He's moving well." I was getting a little frustrated that I hadn't landed much. He'd thrown a few jabs and missed on me by now. I decided to try and feed my right hand in there and see if I could hurt him. I missed with it and got into a flurry with him. I was taking some shots so I backed up a bit and fired back with my right, which connected pretty well. Now, this was my mistake. I could see he was rocked a bit, but instead of rushing him to finish him off, I stood there, waiting to see how stunned he was. (Bad habit). He recovered in a couple of seconds and came back at me. We got into it again and he had me on my heels. I backed up again and when I went to return fire, BAM!!!! I hit the floor. I heard the crowd groan, "Oooooooooohh!" He had caught me above my right eye. I covered up, the bell to end the round rang out. I brought my hand down to look for blood. Yep, there was blood and plenty of it. The doctor climbed into the cage to check my cut. One look and he said, "Nope, you're done." I knew that meant I lose by TKO but I was like, "Yep, I am done." That was the hardest I've ever been hit.

So his hand was raised in victory. Good for him. I acknowledged his good hit. (Albeit it may have been lucky). But a fight where both guys are willing to stand and swing is going to end up that way for one of you. I found myself thinking, "But man, my cardio is so good this time; I'm not even tired." That was the best thing I could think of at that point. Haha.

Anyway, that was the experience. A double layer of stitches later, I'm fine and enjoying life away from the gym for a couple of weeks. My consolation: He broke his hand on my head.

Thanks to everyone for coming out and supporting me. I wish it would have gone the other way, but I think we all still had fun.

And thanks to my sweet wife for letting me do something that she doesn't fully approve, and for supporting me through it all. I love you.

Also, thanks to the doctor who stitched me up. Beautiful job.

To my son Jericho, I love you Buddy and can't wait to spend my nights with you instead of a pair of boxing gloves.

Later on....we'll conspire...as we dream by the fire...

2009-01-25T17:52:00.005-07:00

OK. I'm not sure how this is going to work. I'm sure I'm not going to set this up in the best way but I'm going to do it nonetheless. If you are very politically or philosophically interested or curious, this will be fun....I hope.

For the last....um.....8 years mostly, I've paid especially close attention to the political world, particularly that of the Bush Administration and the goings on in the country and the world during that time. And during that time, there have been some major events that have sort of rocked us all: The attacks on the WTC on September 11, 2001, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, Hurricane Katrina, outrageously priced petroleum, the meltdown of the U.S. economy, and others. I've heard many theories about the why's and what's and how's of these events. But I don't think we've been given many straightforward answers. So, I have come up with several conspiracy theories. Now, don't get me wrong; I'm not hording guns, ammunition, food and water and living in a bunker somewhere. I don't put a ton of stock into most of these conspiracy theories. But I am interested to, one day, find out what the facts were. And, I've heard some theories that are a bit out there, to say the least.

So, I'm beginning a new blog project, that I'm hoping will draw people's theories and thoughts out, in regards to the above-mentioned events, as well as others. There will be no guidelines; you can tell me what you've seriously, actually thought, or you can just give examples of the crazier conspiracy theories you've come across. As well, your responses can be just the general musings that have plagued your mind from time to time. And this will not just apply to the Bush Administration. I will try to cover some others as well, and there's bound to be some arise from the Obama Administration eventually. And we'll just tackle one event per entry I think, so I'll try to post a new event at least weekly.

OK...Let's begin with a big one: The attacks on 9/11.

We have a plane hit one of the trade towers, on video. Bush is in the South reading to some school children. There's confusion. Was it an accident? We didn't know so we didn't scramble any jets or military to take action. Not long after, a second plane hits the other trade tower. Another one flies into the Pentagon. I've seen pictures of the explosion, but where's the plane. A fourth plane crashes in a field in Pennsylvania. Some video was shown on the news briefly, then never again. You can look it up on Youtube though. There's a hole in the ground, sure enough. But no plane parts.

Bush is told we're under attack. Jets are scrambled off the East Coast. The response is too late. Thousands are dead, and some of the ones still alive are jumping from 100 story windows to their quick but tragic deaths. The country, the WORLD is shocked. The world's superpower, that mighty beacon of light called The United States of America has been hit and hit hard. Right away, we're certain enough to know who did it, that Bush says it right on TV; It was Bin Laden, Saudi Arabia's prodigal son. I wonder how we knew that; Could it have been that memo that Condi gave to Dubya about a week previous? That memo which stated Bin Laden was determined to attack inside the U.S.---using planes?

OK....I've certainly left out some details. Fill them in for me if you'd like. But I'd like to know the things that have rolled around in your heads since this horrible, tragic day.

Why wasn't the memo taken seriously? Or was it? Why wouldn't Cheney give NORAD the clearance to use jets to shoot down the commercial jets? Why didn't they show the photo of the PA crash on the news after that first time? Where were the plane parts and body parts? And a HUGE one for me: Why did Bush and Cheney agree to talk to the 9/11 Commission about what they knew, but refused to testify, under oath, and on the record?

OK, so that's the general idea. I just want your ramblings. Hundreds or thousands of things have gone through my mind about these events. I want to know what has gone or continues to go through your heads. The point: It will be fun, years from now when we may know more to see if any of us were more correct, or more wrong, than we now know.